good morning sunshine and welcome back
to another episode of shine buzz daily
where it's all about raising your
vibration taking inspired action and
moving forward to create the life that
you want after a toxic relationship
today I'm going to share with you
something I don't know it's kind of an
inspirational story to be honest with
you and I think you're really going to
like it
so stick with me as we do this now just
for those of you who are new around here
we start this session off with about 15
or 20 minutes of content sometimes a
little less then we read the cards and
then we jump into the chat so stick
around if you have questions comments
concerns or things you want to talk
about and let's get going good morning
Peggy how are you
all right we're bustin into it it's
gonna be a good one today I hope I think
you guys are really gonna enjoy this so
let us let us do it alright so we're
gonna talk today about the singer
actress Demi Lovato who recently
overcame some toxic relationship issues
and found the love of her life you're
gonna like it so let's just do it if you
have ever found yourself and I know a
lot of you have found yourself in a
toxic relationship you know very well
how alone you feel and how when the
going gets tough you you look around and
most of the people that used to support
you aren't there or you're just alone
for other reasons
narcissists and talks to people to
isolate us in relationships and as we've
discussed many times when someone is
struggling with active addiction or
alcoholism during the active addiction
part they tend to behave just like a
narcissist even if they're not otherwise
in our system right so today I'm going
to share a story with you that proves
that not only are you not alone but that
toxic relationships can literally affect
anyone at all even the rich and famous
the young and beautiful all the people
right so I hope that you're gonna find a
little bit of inspiration in this story
as well as a new level of understanding
in your own situation and maybe I don't
know maybe even a new theme song so
let's catch a shine buzz so 27 year old
Demi Lovato
is a singer-songwriter actress and
television personality you might
remember that she started her career
back in 2002 when she appeared on a on
the children's television series Barney
and Friends anybody but then she rose to
prominence for portraying Michie
tourists in the Disney Channel musical
film called camp rock in 2008 and then
its sequel Camp Rock to the final jam in
2010 her parents divorced when she was
only two years old and her father
Patrick Lovato who unfortunately died of
cancer in 2013 was an alcoholic and drug
addict and her mother Dianna had said
that she she's quoted and I'm gonna I'm
gonna read the quote to you she says I
thought I could change him and I think
victims of domestic abuse often feel the
same way you're not always gonna be able
to change someone no matter how much you
want to there may come a point where
your love for that person may not be
enough to keep you safe she said this in
a recent biography that she released so
at that time Diana left her husband
Patrick took her daughter's Demi and
Dallas and went to a women's shelter now
we all know how hard that is and how
difficult that choice must have been for
her right well this is interesting
because it's kind of a two generational
story of abuse and and and recovery bear
with me later
Demi would would say that her abusive
father influenced her first foray into
drugs she was only 17 years old she was
still working with the Disney Channel at
the time and just two years ago she when
she was 18 she ended up in the hospital
with an overdose and we're going to talk
about that in a minute but in in a
youtube documentary a couple years ago I
think three years ago it was called
simply complicated Demi said I felt out
of control the first time I tried drugs
and she said she guess she she's I'm
gonna quote her here I guess I always
searched for what he found meaning her
father in drugs and alcohol because it
fulfilled him and he chose that over a
family
she added that his mental illness made
him incapable of even being with her
taking care of his family
and I think a lot of us are going to be
able to relate to this next part she
said I was very conflicted when he
passed because he was abusive and she
added he was mean but he wanted to be a
good person and later she said that he
wanted to have his family but when her
mom married her stepdad he her father
still had this huge heart where he said
I'm so glad that he the stepfather is
taking care of you and doing the job I
wish I could do now I'm not gonna speak
ill of the dead but if I'm being honest
that seems a little familiar to me
right anyway Jamie has said that she has
been diagnosed with bipolar disorder
that this is very public information I'm
not telling you anything she hasn't
already told the world and and like her
mother has struggled with eating
disorders but again she's been very open
about this and I think that's powerful
in some really good ways because when
you have someone like her standing up
and saying hey this is what I'm dealing
with we feel less alone right well her
mother revealed her own issues with the
eating disorders as well as xanax
addiction in her recent book and we also
know that a lot of times when you have
someone in a toxic relationship they
will turn to things like drugs alcohol
even eating disorders to sort of you
know find I don't know comfort to numb
out to feel like they're in control of
something the eating disorder part
according to Demi's manager in that film
that we talked about the YouTube film
she said he said he said his name was
Phil Phil Mac McIntyre he said demi was
living two lives and he said once the
camera stopped rolling she's living
another life she couldn't really be
herself she wasn't a normal teenager she
couldn't be one so this would eventually
lead to her tipping point where she did
go to rehab at the age of 18 in November
2010 after a public outburst which
apparently included her punching a
backup dancer in the face and I read
that she said something about all I was
thinking was I'm gonna beat
boom up and I and I felt like that was
something that maybe wasn't her usual
style anyway this was in South America
while she was on tour with the Jonas
Brothers and about six months after her
relationship with one of them and and
Joe Jonas and and Demi Lovato apparently
dated
so in January 2018 she was on Good
Morning America and then she said some
really awesome stuff she said I think
she said I make it my life goal to
inspire other people I think it's
important for me to use my voice for
more than just singing I know how I just
know how important it is to use my
platform to help others and to share my
story in hopes that it inspires people
to either get into recovery or better
themselves whatever it is I just want
people to know they're not alone and I'm
here for them I mean I think that's just
a really sweet and I don't know I feel
like she's a giant empath right but then
unfortunately that same year after going
so far as to even provide free therapy
sessions for her fans who attended her
concerts when she toured with dj khaled
she would famously overdose on drugs and
she risked her life I was mistaken at
the beginning when I said she was 18
when she did the overdose I'm sorry
about that but since since then she
obviously she survived thankfully and
she she's been recovering in August of
2018 her team announced they would help
her clear a few toxic relationships from
her life which included I think a
relative and a close friend and someone
else and she's reportedly been actively
recovering since then I saw her on Ellen
I'll tell you that a minute okay
now this gorgeous young woman has come
forward with a whole new attitude and a
story of triumph and she's found a whole
new love and I'm from being honest with
you I think she's really standing in a
place of inspiration for all of us
anyone who has struggled with a toxic
relationship relationship in their life
so Thursday night which was you know
last night / this morning at midnight
she released her new song her first
official single since 20 18 minutes
called I love me right I love it in this
new video which I watched this morning
we see her sort of fighting with
multiple versions of herself like
physically which obviously is symbolic
and later as the song goes on she's
walking down the street she's singing
about the various myriad of insecurities
that holds all of us that the
insecurities that hold all of us down as
we're trying to live a wife and be happy
and so on and so forth and then she
sings of her newfound love self-love
which I just love we see this beautiful
confidence coming out of her and she
just she looks gorgeous she sounds great
she says I'm gonna I'm gonna read you a
couple of the lyrics so you'll see why
I'm so excited about this she says
because I'm a black belt when I'm
beating up on myself but I'm an expert
at giving love to somebody else I mean
myself and I don't see eye to eye oh why
do I compare myself to everyone and I
always got my finger on the
self-destruct I wonder when I love me is
enough right whoo that's a little anyway
I I happen to catch her on Ellen
yesterday well actually it was on
YouTube so it may have been a couple
days ago that it was recorded but I just
saw it yesterday when she talked about
the single and the road to recovery and
I thought that's powerful and she said
so many things I could relate to as a
survivor and I think that you could
relate to as well I'm sure you can see
that clip still here on YouTube and in
fact what I'll do after the video goes
live is I'll put it in the description
or in the in the pin comment but she
talked about her new self-care routines
that are actually helping her as she's
recovering from that relapse as well as
her eating disorder and near the end of
the interview this is maybe the best
part she turned to the audience and she
said we are good by ourselves we don't
need a partner and we don't need
substances we're good I loved it I feel
like this story offers a special kind of
inspiration for survivors like us and
like I mentioned I feel like her new
song
might just be the theme song a lot of us
really need right now right I want to
know what you think that's the question
of the day what do you think about Demi
Lovato her new song her recovery story
or how can you relate to it so sharing
thoughts ideas experiences in the
comments section or the chat of your
with me live right now and let me know
what you think about this and now my
friends it is time to read the cards so
let's just jump right into it shall we
alright thank you my three loves alright
we are going to first read the card from
our dialectical behavior therapy skills
deck and today we are on number 41 now
you can buy these if you want to I will
put the link in the description after
this session but you don't need to
because I'm sharing all of them with you
and like I said round number 41 so this
is an interpersonal effectiveness skill
our second one and it reads get ready
this is your homework grab your pen or
your pencil on your paper write this
down pay pay mindful attention to others
today focus on the people to whom you're
speaking notice what they're saying with
their words and what their body language
is telling you if you find anything
confusing ask for clarification for
example how are you feeling are we okay
or I noticed you seemed nervous
is that accurate don't do this with a
narcissist but everybody else alright
and next up we are going to read our
daily affirmation for today from the
Gabriella Bernstein super attractor deck
again you can purchase this I'll have it
in the description below but it's not
necessary because I'm sharing all of
them with you and today's card it's a
pretty one and it reads my greatest
spiritual gifts don't come through force
they come through freedom that's a good
one right
my greatest spiritual gifts don't come
from for through force they come through
freedom all right
hello everybody all right hello hello
okay we are going to jump into the chat
so if you have questions comments
concerns things you want to talk about
hit me up in the chat right now and I
will be answering your questions and
we'll go forward from here so what do
you think about the Demi Lovato thing
can you relate to it share your thoughts
ideas everything right
good morning to Peggy good morning to my
three loves changing my life nubia
welcome back Kathie Williams hello hello
what's for tea Martha Ross Bonnie
representing the Mod Squad thank you for
being here
let's see eater welcome hello from
Cyprus my pleasure thank you for being
here eater adore I'm not sure I'm sorry
if I'm saying it wrong hello violet
welcome back Heather Smith says hi Angie
I love your channel thank you miss
Heather Bhama sweet says true yes they
do
you an a good morning mama sweet let's
see joy hello joy my three love says the
emotion in your voice and this message
love it that's awesome thank you so much
miss fantastic is gonna watch it after
this yeah it's it's really miss
fantastic it is it's a good video I
really liked it and yeah crystal says
powerful lyrics indeed yeah changing my
life says I don't even know who that is
but it's an inspiring story right I know
I barely know who it is I'm 44 she's
she's way younger than me but I found it
to be you know I've seen her around I'd
never heard her sing until I
that's how terrible this is I'd never
heard her sing until I totally saw this
video I actually I think I mean I've
been aware of her for a while but I
think the first time I actually even
maybe heard her speak was on a recent
episode of Will & Grace and anyway it I
don't I'm not a big huge fan not that
I'm not a fan but I just didn't know her
very much before but then when I saw her
on this Ellen show which just happened
like sometimes I turn on YouTube and I
just let it run and while I'm working
and I happen to catch this clip and I
thought
you know and then so this morning when I
saw the video show up in my feed I took
a look at it and I thought this is it
you know I have to share this because it
is it's really a positive powerful song
you know and the lyrics as I read them
to you they're they're pretty amazing so
I can totally get it
Nicki says hi everyone hey Nicki welcome
back
hello Katrina welcome back Nargis hello
hello my friend she says on my short
break then back to work okay I
understand honey
she said she said wait a minute she said
thanks for all you do you're the reason
I keep going big hugs to you my friend
you and I said that was powerful it
stunned me into silence right
Lotus hello teri hello Nubia says I love
that when she got help she helped others
me too that was part of the reason I
brought the story to you because I
thought I had no idea she did those
those free therapy sessions after those
concerts or whatever and and now she's
trying to help others even more and by
putting out this song she's really
raising awareness you know everything
that she's doing I mean to be that
transparent and vulnerable aloe is is
very brave in my opinion to share that
kind of private personal stuff and she's
not doing it for fame I really don't
think so I think she's doing it really
to try to help she's already famous she
doesn't have to tell anybody this stuff
but she she's she's reaching out in in
such a powerful way to you know she's
gonna make so many more people aware of
what toxic relationships can do to us
because I really think her reason for
having been on drugs in the first place
was and I mean she even has said it's
because of her father and all of that
but it's a powerful statement on the
fact that there's no you know it could
happen to anyone it could happen to
someone who lives in that you know in a
tent and someone who was in a mansion
and everybody in between you know what I
mean there's no there's no cultural
divide here there's no financial divide
there's no racial divide it's all it
could happen to any of us all the way
across suspect
and it does and so for someone like her
to come out and say listen this is it
this is what this is what I'm dealing
with I hope it just makes you feel a
little bit less alone you know and I'd
want people to think about you know when
you when someone comes out with their
story like I come at you know I've
talked about my story but I'm sorry my
earrings bothering me
III's have talked about my story
multiple times but I'm not some famous
you know like person who's been famous
since she's born and you know or since
she's a little kid whatever I guess my
point is um yeah the name of the song
sue is I love me it's really really good
yeah
Bhama sweets says being a member of the
entertainment being a member of the
entertainer arena has pressures of its
own but to carry that weight Plus being
in a toxic relationship is a pure
struggle for survival Demi has my
prayers right yeah and you know what the
sad part is we don't know for sure that
this is at the end of her struggle and
that hurts me a little bit for her but I
hope that by you know displaying this
strength that she has displayed I hope
she finds you know inspiration even in
herself as she you know maybe goes back
and looks at that video or you know it's
I think coming out with your public
coming out publicly with struggles like
that puts you in a very vulnerable
position but by doing that she's going
to help so many other people become
aware you know how many teenagers are in
toxic relationships right now and don't
even know it you know what I mean
I think she might really create some
positive change in the world by coming
out this way and I love that what's for
tea oh because el says freedom love that
right from the affirmation what's for
tea says my my sister texted me a clip
from her Grammy performance anyone she
and her husband were both crying I have
to admit it touched me to not in to Demi
Lovato but certain things are just
powerful same same yeah I'm not like I
said I'm not necessarily into her but I
certainly I certainly get it yeah Martha
exactly you don't share that for fame
right she's not doing it for that reason
she's doing it because she's trying to
help you know it's it's
hard to show you your your story that
way and so with her reaching out and
trying to help like that I just I find
it very powerful and inspirational Azul
hello welcome welcome back Martha says
the title alone is great right right I
know I know Uncle meow-meow welcome back
I love your name says I hope more
awareness helps wake those stuck or
coping with in the aftermath of being
connected to a narcissist that they do
not need to stay there is help and
support yes yes that is what I'm talking
about that's it because truly you know
if I know a lot of people here I don't
know if everybody here but a lot of
people in this family a lot of them the
several of my followers people who have
talked to for coaching even I've seen
people go to shelters like her mother
did but that's a really hard choice to
make you know and so to look at her
coming from that and you know thankfully
she made it she got through it and she
didn't you know she made it she survived
her overdose and everything else but my
gosh I imagine that the amount of
turmoil this girl must be dealing with
every day you know what I'm saying
anyway
yeah Bhama says it took a lot of courage
for Demi but talking and music there and
talking and music is their therapy Bravo
yes yes and MS fantastic agrees music is
great therapy
Richard Dobbins welcome back my friend
and Bridget Bracken welcome she says
thank you for talking about her I have
bipolar as well and it's nice to see
some positivity with those in recovery
instead of us being depicted as monsters
like most people do I'll tell you what
Bridget I did some research a while back
my nose sorry I did some research on
what I think I have a tickle I'm sorry I
did some research a while back where I
looked into because somebody asked me
you know what's the difference between
bipolar and narcissism because
apparently
some of these symptoms will overlap but
the thing is narcissists don't have
empathy and if we know anyone with
bipolar we know that they're often
wracked with empathy sometimes they have
so much empathy that they're just in
pain outside of their control even you
know so I've never I would never say
that someone with bipolar is a monster
never sue says have a great day everyone
gotta go now okay sue thank you happy
shined a peeps says villian welcome back
my friend happy to have you back
Bhama says pure liberation freedom by
helping Demi get a little more freer
everyday right yes
Rapunzel says I totally get how toxic my
father is and to wait I totally I didn't
totally get how toxic my father is until
I was 51 I just knew there were certain
things he didn't like he did that I
didn't like I'm now understanding they
are the root of my anxiety and
depression and sadly I think that's more
common than we care to admit you know I
think that so many people you know find
themselves in that in that place where
they're like we think something's wrong
with us and we think something is you
know causing us additional pain
additional struggle and we don't realize
that it's really coming from that that
core wound you know which very often is
caused by a toxic parent you know
constant invalidation and childhood
constant control constant you know lack
of ability to sort of grow forward and
you know so I get that yeah Giselle says
our stories need to be told right
exactly they do and that's I think
that's the thing that she's doing here
she's telling her story but she's also
by telling her story she's putting you
know she's putting it on the forefront
like hey everybody here's this famous
woman young woman who
who has had to come forward and say this
happened to me I struggled with this I'm
human just like the rest of you and hey
by the way you're not alone here you
know yeah
Gillian says that's huge recognizing
situations that have occurred in
childhood and how they have affected us
is the very foundation of recovery and
being able to thrive congratulations yes
that's right
Thank You Gillian Martha says we're
huntin to rapunzel it took me until 59
to finally go no contact one year today
happy Anniversary baby
how you doing that's great Martha I'm
great glad to hear Gillian agrees that
is amazing yeah
so I I really I just wanted to share
this story with you guys today I wanted
you to understand that you know as if
you know no we're not alone out there
it's not just us it's it's everyone it
affects everyone in different ways not
every single person but people from
every single walk of life including the
rich and famous so yeah old behavior
exactly all right well I am seeing not a
whole bunch going on in the chat right
now so if you guys are finished for
today I will wrap up and we will talk
again tomorrow yeah all right thank you
so much for being here with me thank you
for watching this and and chatting with
me about it and I will see you tomorrow
same bat-time same bat-channel
as always thank you so much for being
part of my day and a part of my life and
hey thanks for letting me be a part of
yours it really doesn't mean a lot to me
I'll see you soon