- We're back.
- Lynelli's hair salon.
- I mean, it couldn't have been that bad
cause I'm back for another appointment.
- Yeah, what are we doing today?
- Hold on, let me intro the video.
- Oh, all right.
(laughing)
- We're not just cutting my hair,
we're also filming a YouTube video.
- Yeah.
- Hi everybody.
(Cough)
Oh, yours sound real
(laughing)
every time.
I'm back home in Manitoba.
(Cheering)
I drove the cross country 26 hours to get back here.
- Its groundhog peter back here.
(Laughs)
- I'm back home in Manitoba
and my mom loves cutting my hair.
- I do.
- And I love having my mom on my YouTube channel.
So I thought, hey, what better way to get her on here
than to let her cut this mess?
I have not had a haircut
since the last time you cut my hair.
- Yup, short here, long here.
- I should clarify, I have not had a professional haircut
since the last time...
- There we go, professional.
(laughter)
- I have in fact been trimming my own hair.
Nobody can tell though.
I think I do a pretty good job.
- We'll see.
- It's gotten out of hand.
- It's very long.
- It is very long and I kind of love it.
So this frightens me.
- Well, we'll just trim it a few times.
So then it doesn't look like I cut as much, a little secret.
You can see here, I just kind of took..
Yeah, there's like short pieces and long pieces and..
- It's curly, nobody can tell.
- Once I start this, that'll be gone.
(Sigh)
(laughter)
- Okay wait, let's do the intro before you start.
Oh, no!
Looking back, there are so many things that I can tell
that I missed about the fact that I was gay
and had no idea.
And I'm wondering if there's signs
that you guys might've noticed
that like looking back you've now realized.
Like childhood signs or signs when I was growing up
that I was gay.
And I asked my mom the other day and I was like
hey, this is the video that I wanna film.
I'm telling you now
So you have like a few days to think of stuff
and she's like, "well, oh no, I have things."
"Oh no, I know."
- Not a lot, there's a few.
- There's a few.
- Hi everybody.
- Oh. - Randy is here.
(Sigh)
(Clink)
- The whole family, except Denney.
- She's working.
- Yeah Denney has a real job.
(chuckling)
- So do I.
(laughter)
- So do you kind of.
- In my salon.
- ...After this video.
- Also, now that you're here.
I want no comments at all this shirt.
I did not bring this shirt.
I found this waiting for me in my childhood bedroom.
So I don't know whose fault this is, but it's not mine.
- This is a gay shirt.
- Or it's just like a dad going on a tropical vacation.
- Denney bought it for Hawaii day at school.
And then we kept it for later for a gay shirt.
And then what's with like one side untucked?
- Oh, I dunno it was just.
- Is that a gay thing?
- I'm not sure.
I don't know, is it, what are you guys think?
- That would be one sign that we could have figured out
that you were gay is your sense of style.
- Or lack of it. - Or lack of it.
(laughing)
You never cared, what we ever dressed you in.
Like just whatever.
- Well, there's mixed signals, like even this morning,
there's a woodpecker and she jumped up.
(Laugh)
- Got excited about the woodpecker.
Oh, do we have it wrong? Again?
- That's wrong.
In junior high, maybe that would be a sign too.
I don't know if that's a sign.
You dated half of the junior high.
(laughter)
Which was a concern
and then you never cared if they broke up, bye bye.
- Is that a sign?
- I don't know.
- Yeah, no for sure is.
- She dated everybody in junior high.
(laughter)
Actually I was a little concerned.
- I remember.
- Why are you dating all these people?
- Because I confused feelings of friendship with like
Oh I must have a crush on this person
cause I like being around them.
There goes to the light, we'll be back.
- When can I start cutting your hair?
- Hi everybody Alayna from the past here.
Pre haircut, Alayna.
Oh God, how's this gonna go?
Here, take one, good, long last look.
Just in case this goes terribly wrong.
I am just popping in to tell you about today's sponsor
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I just finished "Little Fish" by Casey Plett.
It was so good.
Little fish is a story of a 30 year old trans woman.
It's based in Winnipeg, Manitoba
which was so neat, would highly recommend it.
Again, you can download and listen to little fish
if you use my link
audible.com/Alayna or text Alayna to 500-500.
Now let's go get my haircut, again.
And we're... - We are back.
- And we are back, yeah I had...
- So we were chatting about you
dating all of the junior high.
- Seven boyfriends in junior high.
- seven boyfriends?
More than that.
- No.
(Laughs)
- I coached my daughters in a lot of volleyball
and Alayna played volleyball till grade 10.
And one thing I noticed is she always
tried out for girls teams.
(laughter)
- Wow, you guys didn't see this coming?
- All you parents out there watch out.
And your best friends were always boys.
Like you hung out with boys all the time and it kinda...
- Stop brushing, we are going, mum
Can we, did we learn nothing?
Did we learn nothing from the last time?
Dad, okay.
- All right, just cut it without brushing then.
- Wood pecker.
- She's still interested about woodpeckers?
- I don't, I'm uninterested.
Hold on, let's talk about what we're doing
before you to start cutting.
What are we?
What's the plan?
- How much do you wanna cut off?
- Like maybe like an inch.
Maybe we start with an inch we'll see.
- So it's very long in the back.
- [Randy] That's what he said.
(Laugh)
- Is this a gray hair?
- I've got lots.
(Gasp)
I've got a bunch of gray hairs.
Got a bunch of gray hairs going on.
- This switching back and forth is stressing you out.
- Oh, don't pull it mom.
- I can't pull it out?
- No.
(laughter)
- Well you don't wanna have that one lonely gray.
Do you?
- Why not? - Okay, all right.
- I'm older and wiser. - Okay.
- I'm becoming astute. - Alright.
- Okay wait, what were we talking about?
Oh, I had all boyfriends.
- Yeah, like your best friends, were boys.
I'm like, I think he wants to date you.
No, no we're just friends.
I'm like, oh okay...
I would think he wants to date you.
Most boys don't just wanna be your friend
in junior high and high school.
- In junior high and in high school
I always have like a thousand crushes.
Yeah - Okay.
- That's good.
- You can't keep moving around though.
- Sorry, yeah, I always had a thousand crushes on everybody
but I think it was more like, I don't know
I thought it was fun.
I thought the whole dating thing
and flirting and all of that was fun.
But then when we would actually, when I would actually
start dating somebody, then it wasn't...
- Like the title?
Like the title?
- Yeah and the like, and the exclusivity of it.
- Yeah, okay.
- It was suddenly like, well, this isn't..
Now, I don't want it anymore.
And so then I would date people and then break up with them.
- And you'd be so fine with it.
It's like, you weren't even like sad or, you know
most people are in rooms for a bit crying or
you know, oh guess, guess who I just broke up with, move on.
- And that's what also led me to thinking for a while
that I was demi romantic or like on the A romantic spectrum.
Cause I just didn't care about romance.
I didn't care about it.
I didn't want it.
I didn't want you to buy me flowers.
I didn't want you to do cute things for me.
I didn't wanna hold your hand.
I assumed, oh, this must be because I don't like romance
not, oh this might be because I don't like men.
(chuckling)
- And then you played a boy in a play.
(laughter)
What play was, what was that called?
Was that the princess bride?
- That was the princess bride.
- Yes, and you were amazing.
You were the perfect boy.
- Thank you very much, thank you so much.
- And you studied being a boy
and how boys walked and their mannerisms.
And some people would even say
"I didn't know that was a girl."
"I thought that was a boy."
- I was so excited. - Yeah.
- Like I was so excited to play a boy.
I would dress up my costume.
And like, I would sit in the hallways at school
and like watch how the boys walked and stuff.
And then I would like walk around
and like sit like them and whatever.
And I felt so much more comfortable.
Like I didn't wanna take it off.
And you were like, so excited to put that outfit on
or whatever be like..
- Yeah cause I got to wear boys' clothes.
I got to wear baggy pants, oversized pants
and like a bigger, more boxy boys T-shirt and I loved it.
I hadn't thought about the style part of that.
That's interesting.
(laughing)
When I was in my costume
I would flirt with my friends
like as like a joke, ha ha ha so funny.
Now I'm a boy, so now we can like flirt.
Speaking of the theater things, the year before that
(Laugh)
do you remember when I played in grade 10
in the grade 10 school play?
The one that we wrote as a class.
- Don't remember that, did we get to see it?
- Yeah, I would think so.
It was based on Beatles songs.
- Oh, our favorite movie.
- "Across The Universe."
- Oh, yeah she was, oh, what's her...
I don't know her name.
- Starts with P.
Dear...
- [Randy] Prudence.
- Prudence. - Prudence.
- I played Prudence, the woman who was struggling
with her sexuality because of her religion.
This was the character that I wrote for myself in grade 10.
In the play, I had a crush on this girl.
She was played by
(bleep)
- Oh, are you saying her name on camera?
- I'm gonna bleep it, but do you remember her?
- Yes.
- The final scene that I'm in
is me and her sitting on the stage and we are like
are about to kiss.
- Yes! yes, yes, yes I remember that.
- And then the curtain goes down, the lights go down.
- Yes I remember that. - And I remember
always thinking to myself, like
what if they put the lights down too late?
Like what?
Like, cause we're leaning in for this kiss.
Like what if they don't put the lights down fast enough?
Or what if the curtain doesn't go down?
Like, will we have to kiss?
- And you're like, I hope so.
- I wrote this.
Like I wrote that part for myself and no one's like, hm.
- Oh my God, you remember that one.
I just remember like the last part
of you guys going in for the kiss.
That's I don't remember anything else
but I just remember you and that girl
going in for the kiss?
Is she gay?
- I don't think so, who knows?
- Maybe she's bi.
- Maybe, we really don't know.
(Laugh)
There's no way to tell.
- Oh, your ends are dry.
- So what are you doing?
You're on the high up section there.
- I'm doing layers.
- Okay, but how are you cutting the layers?
You're not just going straight across, right?
- No, no as a layer.
- What's she doing? Do you approve father?
Grade 10, I played a lesbian
and then one of the other years I played a boy
and I don't remember what the other school play was.
- You were always acting.
- [Randy] How about in the elementary Christmas program,
what did you play there? - A cow.
I was so excited to be that cow.
(laughter)
And the Bethlehem story.
- Yeah, you were Baby Jesus once.
- There you go again, playing a boy.
- Do we know if Jesus was a boy?
Oh yeah.
(Laughter)
- That's a hot take, mom.
Was Jesus a boy?
We really don't know.
- For me the number one thing
(gasp)
that should have given it away.
(scream)
- What, what?
- I just cut myself.
- How do you cut your.. - Just a little bit.
It's not bleeding very much.
- Is this, am I supposed to be trusting?
You just cut your own finger.
- The number one reason growing up
I should have known that you were gay is, Zeke.
(laughter)
- Oh no, oh no.
- The girls didn't play with their dolls and I was Zeke
and Zeke could never go to the party.
Couldn't get in the car, couldn't come to the pool.
Couldn't play, Zeke go away.
That was, it should have known right there.
Take that, this is for Zeke.
- Where did you find that? - Yeah.
- It was in one of your 20 boxes of keep sakes.
- Oh, my word, Zeke. - Look at Zeke
Me and Denney would play dolls and yeah
you would come in with Zeke and we were like.
get out. - [Randy] Shunned.
(Beep)
- I was trying to think back to like
do I know signs from like junior high high school.
I can remember, but childhood
the only thing is when I think about the Disney movies
that we would watch.
My favorite characters
like the ones that I always just couldn't wait to see
were always the women.
Meg, from "Hercules", obsessed.
"The Road To El Dorado."
Do you remember, dad, that woman that they meet
when they go to El Dorado and she has like the
like that skirt thing where her like, with a big slit
up her leg?
(laughing)
Lilo and Stitch, the like sister, the adult woman.
- [Randy] Yeah, okay.
So you always wanted to be grown up, is what you're saying.
- That was my preoccupation, yeah.
(beep)
- After you got engaged.
- Mm hmm.
- Or even as a child, like lots of girls
always are excited about their wedding
and they fantasize about like their wedding dress
and what the wedding was gonna be like.
And I was excited about your wedding.
- That makes one of us.
- I know exactly, right?
But you never, ever were excited about any part of it.
Like I want to plan a shower.
Well, no, maybe then I'll have it next year
cause I don't know when we're gonna get married.
Maybe we're going to postpone it a year.
And then I think you were super excited about COVID.
Cause now we don't have to have a wedding, cause it's COVID
that was a sign too, that you weren't excited about
any part of the wedding.
- I don't know, I just didn't...
- I think you tried.
- Aha I did.
- You tried, but you genuinely
weren't excited about it like...
- No. - Yeah.
- [Randy] Does that mean I'm gay?
I wasn't either.
(laugh)
- Uh, oh.
- And now when we talk about a wedding
you know exactly what kind of wedding you want.
Like what you wanna wear when we talk about the wedding now.
- Is this gay or just good friends?
(laugh)
- Depends, what's his name?
- Chawatawa.
- What?
- Chawatawa.
- Chawatawa? - Chawatawa?
- [Randy] Yeah.
- I think we should celebrate Chawatawa and Zeke's love.
- [Randy] He's got a knife to his throat.
- Wedding.
- Can we have another beer.
- Well it's right there.
(Can opening)
- I love afternoon drinking.
(laughter)
It's like fun.
- [Randy] I wouldn't rule out morning or evening
for you either.(laughter)
- Before I got engaged, I always just thought
Oh I just don't care about weddings
I just don't care about it, it doesn't interest me.
So I just never thought about it.
And then once I was engaged and it was actually like
okay, time to plan a wedding, nothing, nothing felt right.
- I wanted to plan a shower and this is Alayna.
Was like, what's a shower?
(Laughter)
- Really?
- People just bring you gifts?
I was like, yeah.
- I thought it was like, baby shower, I thought baby shower.
I didn't know you had a wedding shower.
It's just something that I literally never thought about.
(Clank)
(laughter)
- Don't, stop.
Oh no.
- Okay, we're just gonna turn the camera this way.
I was just uninterested beforehand
and then when it actually was like, oh, now you're engaged.
You have to plan this thing.
It went beyond uninterested to like anxiety inducing.
- You weren't excited about it.
- No it wasn't excited about it.
- Yeah. That's about it for me.
Like as a newborn baby didn't know.
(laughter)
You were always in charge.
You're always in charge person.
But I don't know if that's that's just personality.
I think you're just a take charge kind of person.
- Yeah, there's a word for that.
I think I said this in a different video
but whenever I'd play house, I always was
either the dad or like the cat.
- Just even your grad dress
you didn't care anything about your grad dress.
Like most girls are like
woo let's go grad dress shopping,
being laid up out three outfits and they were
under a hundred dollars for three outfits.
Couldn't care less.
Yeah, no that's good.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, okay, that's fine, yeah.
- Cause I didn't like it.
I just wanted you to pick. - Yeah.
- I was like you pick whatever, I don't care.
My hands.
(laughter)
- They're not man hands, I have the same.
We have the same hands.
- Maybe it's the nails, I don't know.
- Your finger nails like your uncle's.
(chuckling)
- There you go.
Exactly
I think this is good, what do you think?
I like this, I'm happy with it, thank you.
You think it's done, you're the professional here?
- No, I think it's good.
I think the dry hair cuts are a good idea.
Cause then you know how the curls are gonna go.
What's gonna happen.
- Oh, oh really? Who's been saying that?
- I can curl like...
- No, no, no, no, oh, thank you very much.
And thanks for sharing.
- I think it looks great.
- Oh, thank you.
(chuckling)
- Your turn
- Nope, no, I'm not gay.
- Only the gays get their hair cut by their mom.
- I cut Denney's hair.
- Oh oh, hey, and Denise didn't wanna play with Zeke either.
Just saying, just saying.
That's it for this video.
I love you all very much.
Thank you for watching.
- Nice seeing you all again.
- Bye-bye.
- Oh no!
- This is why we didn't want to play with Zeke.
- [Randy] Just a Beaver.
- And once more, I'd like to give a huge shout out
to Audible for sponsoring this video.
Use my link, audible.com/Alayna.
It's also linked to my description
and you can try audible for free for 30 days.
If you don't wanna use the link, you can also text Alayna
to 500-500 and there you can get your copy
of the little fish by Casey Plett audio book.
And whether you keep your audible membership or not
the audio book is yours to keep forever.
So check it out.
Thank you audible.
As always, a huge thank you to my VIP Patreons.
♪ My vitally important producers. ♪
Oh you were like half know it.
(Laughter)
It's thanks to all of you that I can make content like this.
- Thanks for letting me know what you wanna see
in my next video.
- [Randy] Zeke, Zeke, Zeke.
- No more Zeke.
I love you all very much
and I'll see you in the next one.
Bye. - Bye.
(Kisses)
This hair grows. - Yeah,
but it's just, but the brushing.
- [Randy] She's giving you dead ends
she's just teasing it so much...
- Yeah, exactly.
- I have to Alayna. - You don't have to.
- Well then you can make it like your little curls
later, it'll be fine.
- Okay.