As we grow up, we lose our playful nature
Children come into our lives to re-instill our playful nature
Play with them and guide them during play.
“Tell me and I will forget. Show me and I may remember
Involve me and I will understand”, said Confucius.
This is true for all of us, whether we are children, or grown-ups.
So, the key to instilling good habits in children is by becoming a role model.
Parents are the role models for children, especially little ones, pre-teen years.
When anthropologists studied ancient cultures, be it Mayan culture,
or the Inuit, what they found was that the children were involved at home from an early age,
making the bed, setting the table, cleaning the home, and so on and so forth.
Parents in these cultures took extra efforts to ensure that the children were actively involved.
Instead of telling, do with your children, work with them.
You want them to go to bed early, change the routine at home to facilitate early bedtimes.
You want them to read, then read with them. Make it playful and not instructional.
As we grow up, we lose our playful nature
Children come into our lives to re-instill our playful nature
Play with them and guide them during play.
Finally, a tantrum is a pre-emptive declaration of war. De-escalation is the key.
If you confront a toddler having a tantrum, they will match us a decibel for a decibel.
Have you not experienced it? The key thing here is to distract their attention,
with humour and de-escalate the situation
Finally, remember that we need to discipline our love and not love discipline.
Raising children is an act of growing in our own ability to love.
Science shows that when children are younger
parents and immediate family members act as role models.
However, once they enter their teen years,
children look for leadership figures and role models outside of home.
It is a trait that has developed thanks to evolution
As kids grow up, it becomes difficult for parents to give direct advice.
By the age of ten or twelve, they have started forming their own identity, their own ego.
Children rebel against direct instructions
At the same time, they look upto leader figures and role models outside their homes
Look out for these members in your family and community whom your children
look upto and share your concerns with them.
Build a safety net of advisors,
who look out for your children and also meaningfully convey your concerns.