AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
WE'RE ALL DOOMED
PEOPLE ARE BREATHING OUT THIS LIVING POISON
TRYING TO FLOAT INTO MY ORIFICES
I LOST MY CAR KEYS, I HAD TO STEAL MY NEIGHBOR'S SEGWAY TO GET HERE TODAY
AND ON THE WAY I CRASHED INTO THIS DUMPSTER, AND SOME KIDS WERE MAKING A VIDEO
AND NOW I'M ON TIKTOK, I CAN'T
Excuse me...yeah?
Be not hysterical?
Despite...you know...things?
Oh! I can do that. Dignified.
Gentlemen, welcome, to the first presidential debate.
Our first question, in the key of G# minor is
Skoo doob m doodit, Dewey didn’t bib-uda bab-ada boo, Bob-a doodit,
Brrrr la pa pa pa pa doo, Doppum boo-by doo-doo bow doo, Shove wit the cow, papa doody
I'm so sorry...
2020's a raging hellscape
Any ideas on how to stop a world-wide plague?
We should be providing people the help they need
He knew back in February it was a deadly disease
What did he do? He's on tape acknowledging that he knew!
Really?
He waited and waited and waited, and he didn't even tell you.
President Trump did a phenomenal job, people said that
Well...
We got the gowns, we made the ventilators, we got the masks
I don't wear masks like him, every time you see him he's got a mask
The biggest mask I've ever seen...the biggest mask I've ever seen
Will we ever get back all the jobs that we lost
Or should we set up 11 million Etsy shops?
My economic plan would create 1 trillion dollars in economic growth
He has no intention of making it better for you at home
I brought back football, it was meeee, meeeee
What?
Big 10 football, and I'm very happy
Who's it gonna be?
They wanna take out the cows, the cows
In The West Wing?
Now here's the deal - he has no idea what he's talking about
We're living in the Apocalypse, I'm begging you to put a stop to this, pretty please!
- He said he could inject some bleach?!? - They cheat!
If the Supreme Court is truly Supreme
Where's the guac, ground beef, and sour cream
The American people have a right to say, who's the Supreme Court nomin-ay
Her biggest endorsers are from Notre Dame, we have a phenomenal nomin-ay
I ran out of questions but still got a while...
It's time to drop some bars, let's see how you freestyle
In Europe, they live there forest cities, they're called forest cities
It's a forest city
He talks about the art of the deal
China's perfected the art of the steal
Bad things happen in Philadelphia, bad things
(OO oo OO) He's just afraid - Proud Boys, stand back and stand by
He said there were very fine people on both sides
He said maybe we should drop a nuclear weapon on hurricanes
The cars have computers all over the place
(Who's it gonna be?) They wanna take out the cows, the cows
(In The West Wing) Now here's the deal - he has no idea what he's talking about
We're living in the apocalypse, I'm begging you to put a stop to this, pretty PLEASE!
-Keep yapping man - The people understand -He doesn't have a plan
Exploding trees, Covid-19, hurricanes with names past the letter "Z"
Conspiracy theories about vaccines, murder hornets coming from across the sea!
Too many memes about World War III, can't tell what's hell or reality
Earthquakes ruining my whole week, 'cause I dropped my keys in the crack between
the cupholder and my car seat!
(Who's it gonna be?) They wanna take out the cows, the cows
(In The West Wing) Now here's the deal! He has no idea what he's talking about.
We're living in the apocalypse I'm begging you to put a stop to this, pretty please?
- He said they could inject some bleach? - They cheat!
Who's it gonna be?!?
That was really a productive segment, wasn't it? Keep yappin', man.
That was really...something. Now, if you'll exuse me
the murder hornets come out at midnight, so I've got to go home and seal the door to my purge room!
And i'll take this, uh, light breeze with me!
Smell ya later dudes!
Ciao babies!
Skoo doob m doodit
Schmoyoho accent on the YOOOOOOOOOOOO
CHECK OUT WEIRD AL! HE'LL MAKE YOUR LIVE COMPLETE!
SCHMOYOHO ACCENT ON THE YO...whoever sings best gets four years to run the show
Give speeches
Throw paper towels
Sign bills
Touch balls
Shout at children
Watch every Songified Debate HERE and register to vote at Vote.org!
And after you do that, have a great day and a great life!