TODAY WE ARE GOING TO TALK ABOUT BENEDICT ARNOLD.
BENEDICT ARNOLD WAS A GENERAL IN THE AMERICAN REVOLUTION.
HE'S A HERO OF SARATOGA, BUT THE CONTINENTAL CONGRESS
PROMOTED FIVE OTHER GENERALS AND NOT BENEDICT ARNOLD.
BENEDICT ARNOLD WAS VERY BUMMED OUT BY THAT,
SO HE GOES TO PHILADELPHIA.
THERE'S A YOUNG WOMAN, PEGGY SHIPPEN,
WHO IS THE IT GIRL OF PHILADELPHIA.
PEGGY WAS LIKE, I'M HILARIOUS, I'M BRITISH,
AND I'M THE MOST BEAUTIFUL PERSON THAT ANYONE'S EVER SEEN.
SHE HAS A SUITOR NAMED JOHN ANDRE,
BUT BENEDICT SEES HER AND JUST FALLS CRAZY IN LOVE WITH HER
AND TELLS HER, IT'S BETTER WITH YOU--
THIS IS NOT AN EXACT QUOTE.
IT'S BETTER-- YOU ARE SO GREAT.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. YOU'RE SO GREAT.
SO SHE MARRIES BENEDICT ARNOLD, WHO I BELIEVE SHE ALSO LOVED.
OH, GOD. - WHAT?
- I JUST REALIZED THAT I WAS BEING FILMED.
[both laugh] - MY GOD.
- SO, ANYWAY, PEGGY SAYS,
SWEETHEART, YOU DESERVE TO BE BACKED BY THE GOVERNMENT
THAT YOU BELONG TO.
YOU KNOW, THE BRITISH...
WOULD APPRECIATE YOU.
THEY WOULD LOVE YOU.
ALSO, MY FAMILY'S BRITISH.
BENEDICT'S LIKE, NO, NO, NO.
NO, I'M NOT GONNA--I'M NOT GONNA DEFECT TO THE BRITISH SIDE.
THAT'S INSANE.
GEORGE WASHINGTON'S MY DADDY, KIND OF.
PEGGY SAYS, LOOK, I HAVE A FRIEND IN THE BRITISH ARMY,
JOHN ANDRE.
BENEDICT'S LIKE, IS THAT GUY YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND?
PEGGY'S LIKE, WELL, I MEAN,
BENEDICT, IF YOU REALLY WANT TO BE WITH ME,
BE MORE CONFIDENT.
AND BENEDICT'S LIKE, YEAH.
YEAH, I AM GOING TO BETRAY THE UNITED STATES
BECAUSE I LOVE YOU, AND I'M GOING TO PROVE TO YOU
THAT I AM NOT JEALOUS, AND MAKES LOVE TO HIS WIFE.
AND SHE'S LIKE, I LOVE IT. I LOVE BEING A SPY.
THIS IS SO GREAT BECAUSE I LOVE DRAMA.
I'M PEGGY SHIPPEN, LIKE, WHAT AN ADVENTURE.
SHE WAS JUST A SHELTERED, ENTITLED [bleep].
I HAVE THIS WHOLE IMAGINARY CHORUS OF WOMEN THAT ARE LIKE,
DON'T SAY [bleep]. DON'T SAY [bleep].
BUT SHE WAS A [bleep] [bleep]. - [laughs]
- SHE WAS BAD.
PEGGY SAYS, YOU WRITE ME LETTERS.
I'M GOING TO PASS THEM ON TO JOHN ANDRE.
SO BENEDICT WRITES LETTERS WHICH ARE REALLY PASSIONATE.
THEY'RE LIKE, OH, PEGGY, I LOVE THAT I GET TO DO IT WITH YOU,
BECAUSE HE KNOWS THAT JOHN ANDRE IS GOING TO GET THEM.
ALSO, THE CONTINENTAL ARMY IS GOING TO WEST POINT.
ALSO, I LOVE YOU, AND I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU.
SO THEY'RE PASSING LETTERS BACK AND FORTH, BACK AND FORTH,
BACK AND FORTH.
AND EVENTUALLY BENEDICT TELLS JOHN ANDRE,
OKAY, I'M GONNA GIVE YOU THE INFORMATION
ON HOW TO ATTACK US.
I'LL TELL YOU EVERYTHING.
ALSO, I'M GOING TO INVITE GEORGE WASHINGTON TO MY HOUSE,
SO YOU CAN TAKE HIM IF YOU WANT.
LIKE, HIS FRIEND.
- LOVE.
- YEAH, IT SUCKS, SUCKS SO MUCH.
SO THEY MEET BEHIND AMERICAN LINES,
AND BENEDICT TAKES OUT ALL THESE MAPS AND SAYS,
OKAY, IF YOU'RE GOING TO ATTACK, YOU NEED TO ATTACK THIS WAY,
AND THEY'RE SIGNED BY BENEDICT ARNOLD,
WHICH I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY HE WOULD DO THAT.
SO JOHN ANDRE STARTS HEADED HOME.
HE DOESN'T GET VERY FAR BEFORE HE ENCOUNTERS THREE MEN.
THEY'RE LIKE, OKAY, YOU HAVE A RED COAT,
AND YOU HAVE A BRITISH ACCENT.
WE'RE GOING TO SEARCH YOU.
JOHN ANDRE'S LIKE, UGH.
AND HE HAS THESE MAPS,
AND THEY REALIZE THAT BENEDICT ARNOLD
HAS BECOME A TRAITOR.
SO BENEDICT SAYS TO PEGGY, BABE, WE'VE BEEN FOUND OUT.
AND SHE'S LIKE, YOU JUST-- YOU, GET OUT OF HERE.
LIKE, I'LL DEAL WITH IT ON THIS END.
MEANWHILE, GEORGE WASHINGTON IS WALKING UP TO THEIR HOUSE.
GEORGE WASHINGTON, HEAD OF...
LIFE?
THE HEAD OF THE ENTIRE CONTINENTAL ARMY IS LIKE,
OH, I'M GONNA HAVE BREAKFAST WITH, UH, PEGGY AND BENEDICT,
MY FAVORITE PEOPLE IN THE WHOLE WORLD.
HE GETS THESE PAPERS THAT BENEDICT ARNOLD BETRAYED HIM,
AND HE VERY FAMOUSLY SAYS,
WHOM DO WE TRUST NOW?
[shudders] I'M TOO DRUNK.
UM, HE GOES TO THE HOUSE.
PEGGY, MEANWHILE, RIPS OFF HALF OF HER CLOTHES.
SHE'S HOLDING HER SIX-MONTH-OLD.
PEGGY SAYS, AH!
YOU ARE SENT HERE TO KILL MY BABY.
BABY KILLER, YOU'RE HERE TO KILL MY BABY.
AND HE'S LIKE, OH, MY GOSH, YOU'RE CRAZY.
YOU'RE SO CRA-- NO.
HE'S JUST LIKE, UH, WOMEN WITH THEIR HYSTERIA.
SHE'S CRAZY RIGHT NOW, BUT SHE'S ABSOLUTE--
I CAN SAY WITHOUT A DOUBT THAT SHE IS INNOCENT.
SHE WAS--SHE WAS-- SHE WAS BRILLIANT.
SHE WAS GREAT. SHE WASN'T GREAT.
SHE WAS BAD. - [laughs]
- ANYWAY, BENEDICT ARNOLD JOINS THE BRITISH.
HE'S LIKE, HEY, I WAS AMERICAN FIVE MINUTES AGO,
AND NOW I'M BRITISH.
LET'S DO THIS.
AND THEY WERE LIKE, NO, WE DON'T--WE DON'T TRUST YOU
BECAUSE YOU'RE THIS TRAITOR.
JUST [bleep] GET OUT OF HERE, AND HE IS SHUNNED BY EVERYONE.
AND THEN HE WAS THIS, LIKE, LIMPING, SAD MAN,
AND BEFORE HE DIED, HE SAID TO PEGGY,
TAKE OUT MY CONTINENTAL UNIFORM,
AND SHE PUT IT ON HIM, AND HE SAID,
I-I REGRET EVER WEARING ANY OTHER UNIFORM,
AND HE DIED.
HE DIED IN HIS AMERICAN UNIFORM.
YOU KNOW WHAT'S REALLY FUNNY ABOUT BEING DRUNK
IS THAT YOU REALLY FEEL
LIKE YOU'RE DOING ALL THE IMPORTANT THINGS
THAT YOU NEEDED TO DO.
- RIGHT.