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While I was growing up my family did a lot of moving.
I was born in the Philippines,
moved to Saudi Arabia,
then back to Philippines,
then to Canada (and several locations within Ontario),
then to Virginia, USA,
then back to Canada.
*breathes in*
And because we did a lot of moving,
I've had a lot of experience with being the new kid at school.
I sometimes had the solidarity of my sisters whenever we became the new kids,
but of course we were different ages in different classes
and one of us usually made new friends sooner than the other.
I never went to school in the Philippines,
but I did go to a Filipino school in Saudi Arabia.
That's weird, I know.
But it's true!
And that's why I was confused as a kid and thought Saudi Arabia was just another
Very-hot-and-somehow-dry-part-of-the-Philippines.
I was a new student, yes,
but so was everyone else because it was our first time in a school environment.
The biggest change that I've experienced must
have been when we moved to Canada.
We didn't have any family that lived here,
only a few friends that thankfully helped to settle in.
I didn't know English too well and had a girthy accent.
I was only 7, but was aware enough to know that I was different from my classmates
who were predominantly white.
I got my fair share of Asian prejudice growing up,
and I didn't really know how to make friends.
But somehow I did and they just so happened
to have the same birthday as me.
Not only that but also because we shared so many interests.
Video games, Transformers, Power Rangers, (Noice)
I felt so relieved that coming from the other side of the world, being an outsider,
I found things in common with strangers.
And I no longer felt wary about being in a new country.
Today I'm able to maintain friendships with people around the world (internet friends“꒳”)
thanks to modern technology.
But back then moving a few cities away
pretty much meant you were never gonna see your friends ever again. :((((
and after living a year in Hamilton,
I had to say goodbye.
I then moved to MissisSAUga which was an hour away.
I was in grade 3 and while I was nervous making new friends again,
I soon realized that not everyone really had their friend groups established yet.
There were actually a few other new kids as well.
I didn't seem to have that much trouble befriending other kids
because during recess, people would often set up games like tag or foot hockey
and they'd invite pretty much anyone available to play.
And within that group of "random" kids,
I got really close to a few.
One being my rival and best friend at the time, Michael.
He was not only my
nakama (仲間 means colleague, compatriot, friend or comrade),
but also my role model.
I really respected him and his chill, humorous personality.
I wanted to be like him.
That's probably when I really started wanting to be a funny person.
I honestly thought that I'd stay at that school until I graduated,
but near the end of grade five,
my parents told us some news that we were all too familiar with... (o h n o)
This time we were only moving somewhere else within the city
but it still felt like a thousand miles to a kid.
I kept in touch with some friends for a while
but we eventually grew apart.
The move was kind of odd for me and my siblings.
It happened a little more than a month into grade six
so I had to say goodbye to everyone at the beginning of the year instead of the end.
I almost felt like a plot device in an anime,
where a new kid transfers into a class in the middle of the year.
You guys remember the story of Alvin and how that turned out.
But actually when I first moved there,
the teacher appointed one of the students to show me around
and help me feel welcomed.
They belong more with the jocks group and asked me to play football with them during recess.
I didn't want to be alone, but it was then that I realized...
you can't be friends with just anyone.
And that was okay.
They weren't necessarily bad people,
I just didn't feel like I really clicked with any of 'em.
Actually, one of them was kind of a dickhead and bullied me every now and then
but I got through it. (got em)
And so I searched for friends elsewhere.
I needed to be around the nerds...
...and it didn't take long to find them.
I like to think my past moves have helped me befriend people quicker,
especially with Michael's outgoing influence on me.
The school was then split in grade 8
where some of us moved to another school
and some of us stayed
depending on what side of the road you lived on.
We all then became new kids in the newly built school,
so it wasn't really a problem because everyone knew everyone.
Going into high school was
the same
where a lot of the friend groups were pretty much already established
and just carried over from grade 8.
The high school was made up of graduates from three elementary schools
and I was able to befriend people from there as well.
I felt pretty comfortable where I was after so many occasions of being
The-New-Kid™
I was finally a long-term resident.
So when we moved to Virginia in 2006
after I've invested the past eight years in Mississauga,
five, being in the newer area that I moved to,
I had to throw it all away and I felt like all my progress was... reset.
Kind of like dying in lava in Minecraft.
Although I would miss my friends,
I was kind of excited to see what it would be like to move to a new country again.
Excited to see what kind of new people I would meet,
excited to be exposed to new cultures,
but it proved to be a little more difficult than I expected.
Everyone already had their friend groups.
I didn't feel like I really fit in anywhere.
A few people did try to make me feel welcome,
namely one girl who sat beside me in AP US history.
She was nice,
but personally, I don't think we really connected that well,
but despite that, she developed a crush on me
which I couldn't reciprocate
and it felt awkward to continue that acquaintanceship.
She was a nice person, okay?
I didn't hate her,
but I just didn't think we'd be close friends.
And say what you will about not giving her a chance
or staying friends,
but understand that by that time,
I've gone through enough friendships
and met enough strangers to know who I got along with.
I tried to join some clubs namely the Anime club.
To see what kind of people shared my interests...
...and...uhh...
A̴͖̓ǹ̵͇̬͗i̴̡̮̍̐m̵͖͑é̴̢̏ ̸̢́c̸̙͕͌l̵͕̃͆ü̷͉̱͘b̸̮͠.̶̦̙̕ ̵̱̓͜Ȅ̵̢͍v̴̥̅e̵̯̍r̵̡̛̠ý̸̬̹̍ ̴̰͇̌͘s̷͍̒̾ì̴̟ͅņ̴̖̔͗g̴͕̓l̶̫̈́̈ȅ̴̻̺ ̸͇͆Ẅ̴̘̱́ẽ̸͙͎ḓ̸̣̎n̷͈̤̆e̴͕͛͝s̸̞̳̾d̶̯̊̉à̸͔̜̔y̸̨̲̔̅
a̵̺̖̿n̴̛͓̒d̷̻̉͠ ̸͕̞̃w̵̭͐ͅȇ̸͉̼̚'̷͔͗r̸̮̦͂̎e̴̟̾͜͝ ̸̓ͅú̸͙͖͆p̶̫͒ ̷̝̺̚1̴̪̭̓:̴̼͕͐̋4̴̥͐͠5̴̧̄̕
GaRUgAmEEE
(nope i'm out)
Everyone in my year seemed to already have their lives figured out.
They had their academics in line,
they knew what colleges they wanted to go to,
they were applying for scholarships,
while I was just worried about making friends and fitting in.
And it pretty much spent most of 11th grade worrying about that.
I really missed Canada.
I guess that was what led me to depend on the internet and online games to meet new friends
and maintain old ones from back home.
But eventually I thought it wasn't healthy for me to just be cooped up at home all the time.
I thought it might as well embrace the new environment and make the best of it.
I kept looking behind me instead of facing forward.
After some time, I broke out of my timid shell
and tried to be more outgoing.
Especially in my senior year where I got into breakdancing
and really started making lasting friendships.
You guys already know about that story.
Before I even graduated I was already informed
that we were going to move back to Canada.
And so I applied to schools there.
I was accepted by and attended Ryerson University
and it kind of felt like going to school for the first time as a kid again.
Everyone was a new kid who came from all sorts of places around the city,
around the country,
and around the world.
Luckily, one of my high school friends from St. Marcellinus
also got into the same program as I did.
So we stuck by each other through the hells of
architecture along with new friends that we met along the way.
Although it seemed like the end of the world as a kid every time I had to move,
I'm thankful for those experiences
because it helped me build my social skills with people
and prepared me for a world full of strangers
and how unpredictable life can be.
You never really know who you'll become friends with,
Especially not at first glance.
Sometimes it takes a simple interaction over a similar interest.
I'd befriended David in high school because he asked to borrow a scientific calculator
which we then started using to pass notes to each other.
Michael started off as my enemy rival because we both sought to be the best in our talent.
Alvin started off as an asshole and...
stayed that way for the duration that I knew him.
But for all the friendships I've made,
I understand that I would have never seen those kinds of relationships if I kept my doors closed.
Whether you like it or not,
change will come to you.
Whether it patiently waits for you to invite them in
or if it kicks down your door and demands a beverage.
It's up to you on how you would like to treat them.
It's best to embrace it because they are there to teach you lessons.
Some of which might be easy and simple,
and some which could be difficult and painful.
I see new starts to be very refreshing.
I see them as opportunities to do things differently
or even do things the same but with new people and new environments,
which can still yield unique experiences.
Chapters in our lives will eventually come to an end
and we must accept that it's time to turn the page
and continue to the next. (That was deep)
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