welcome to cognitive behavioral therapy nuggets i'm your host dr dawn elise snipes
in this video we are going to talk about something a little bit different we're going to talk about
optimism and ironically for this the mnemonic device is crab grass and i think it's kind of
funny because crab grass is one of those things i come from florida and it's a big issue there
but crabgrass is almost always green and i am really happy when i've got a green lawn
i don't really care what kind of grass it is so that's how i embrace crab grass
even though it may be something of a weed it's green so it serves my purpose and that is
you know what you might call radical acceptance taking the good with the bad
optimism and crabgrass in order to enhance your optimism c stands for create something to look
forward to always have something that you are looking forward to at the end of the day at the
end of the week at the end of the month you know have rewards set out for yourself whether it's a
nice night out with your best friend or sleeping in late whatever it is have little things that you
can look forward to enjoy your life r stands for radical acceptance and that's what i was
talking about just a minute ago with crabgrass find the silver lining with crabgrass itself
as i said it's a weed but it is a weed that stays green almost all year long and it spreads like
wildfire so you know it actually can be kind of helpful in some ways and i know there are
landscapers out there that are cringing right now and i'm sorry for that but radically accepting
what is accepting the good with the bad trying to find the silver lining with kovid you know
recently we've gone through this whole covet and the lockdowns all right the lockdown sucked no
doubt however the for for some of us we were able to spend more quality time with our significant
others my teenagers weren't able to be out and about all the time and they ended up spending
more time with us so that was good quality time the air quality improved in a lot of places we
reduced our carbon emissions so there were some positives to it there were some significant
negatives don't get me wrong um but embracing the good with the bad can help create optimism
a stands for anticipate the positive get up in the morning and think to yourself how is today
going to be awesome not what do i have to deal with today but how is today going to be
awesome anticipate things going well anticipate the positive and b stands for be present
a lot of times when we are not being mindful when we're not focusing on the present moment
we're focused on the future and things that we're worried about or on the past and things we regret
or resent you know that is not creating optimism optimism can be created if we're present and if we
notice what is going on this morning when i was on the way to work a uh skunk crossed right in
front of me in the road and you know no i don't like the smell of skunks but this one wasn't
odiferous and he was this great big cute fluffy little critter and i was so thankful and grateful
that i didn't hit him because it was four in the morning and it was dark and i actually you know
could have if i hadn't been paying attention so being present helps us notice some of the
awesome things in our life helps us notice the little things and not take them for
granted which can encourage optimism because we start noticing the beauty and the wonder
g stands for growth and learning whenever we experience something
figure out how to grow from it and it can be good or bad i try to learn from everybody i encounter i
try to learn something new every day i try to grow as a person and that helps me be more optimistic
r stands for realistic you know optimism has its limits but it's important to be realistic
you're going to really set yourself up for frustration if you have unrealistic
standards and unrealistic goals break it down be realistic about what to expect from people
don't underestimate them but don't overestimate either when you're more realistic then people
meet your expectations and it helps you be more optimistic when you're more realistic you meet
your own expectations and it gives you optimism that you can accomplish whatever you set out for
a is affirm yourself make sure to focus on those positive affirmations every single day and you
can send out affirmations to other people loving-kindness meditation is great for this
but affirming your own worth your own strength your own capabilities
every day can help create optimism because it creates a sense of personal strength and power
s stands for solutions every time you encounter a challenge notice i didn't say problem
every time you encounter a challenge brainstorm solutions my first supervisor always had a rule
you know you can come to me if you've got an issue but also bring at least one solution to that issue
that we will be talking about so it's important not to just complain not just to focus on the and
i'll use the p word the problems we want to also identify solutions that encourages you to think
outside the box which also encourages optimism because instead of focusing on the problem here
you see solutions you see opportunities you see
ways to fix the problem which can help you feel more optimistic
and the last s stands for serenity when we try to change the things that we cannot change we will
get frustrated we will feel powerless we will feel not optimistic when we focus on the things
that we can change and accepting the things we cannot change we will develop a sense of serenity
and that serenity goes with us when we recognize that we can tolerate not succeeding not being
able to control everything all the time it frees our energy up and helps us be
optimistic about the future recognizing that we can't know what's going to happen in the future
we can't control everything that's going to happen in the future but guess what we can survive
because we are surviving right now we are surviving even when we can't control everything
so to sum up crab grass create something to look forward to accept unpleasant situations anticipate
the positive every morning be present focus on all of the good things that are going on right now
grow and learn every day find something to strive towards set realistic goals for
yourself and others affirm yourself and others every day use those positive affirmations
find solutions instead of focusing on the problem focus on solutions to situations and serenity
recognizing we cannot control everything all the time serenity is essential to optimism