Hey, it’s JR right here.
School has started and that means a lot of orientation events are coming your way.
And soon enough your seniors are going to be asking you the big question.
Do you want to go to the department orientation camp?
When I say “ask,” I actually mean they just want you to go.
You don’t have to go if you don’t want to.
But you know, they’ve probably put in a lot of effort and spent a lot of money on it
and they probably need you to chip in.
Yes, syue jhang! This is my fee.
Now that’s right, syue di! Welcome to college!
The pros of going you get to see your classmates and seniors much faster
and it might be helpful in the coming years.
Cons are.. it’s usually not that cheap and you might have to take off your pants.
in some rare.. unlikely to happen..
and actually did happen this year cases. Which happened to have made the news.
That’s how I found out.
I have a friend and who was a fraternity leader at MIT.
College in the States have all these cool fraternity names like
Sigma Pi, Omega Alpha, Delta, Gamma, Beta, Kappa, Delta Gamma Beta Kappa [Σ π, Ω α, Δ, Γ, β, Κ, Δ Γ β Κ]
They have all these mysterious symbols on their fraternity buildings
and you can only know the meaning of it when you’re in the fraternity.
My friend, in fact, told me that he would have to kill me if he told me what it meant.
I can like sue him for that, right?
So their fraternity had all these tasks that their freshmen had to pass to qualify for the fraternity.
It’s like a dare challenge.
One of them was to require the freshmen to run to Harvard University nearby
pee on the Harvard statue and come back without getting caught.
That’s crazy!
No, on second thought, that actually sounds like something that I would do.
[Whistle sounds]
But things sometimes go out of control.
A college freshman actually died this year in the U.S. during an orientation event.
So if you’ve just entered college and people ask you to do dumb things
well know when to say “No!”
No one can force you to do anything you don’t feel like doing or anything that makes you feel uncomfortable.
People here recently have been talking about some orientation camps that went too far.
Saying provocative stuff, implying sexual matters..
Not like I’m over-conservative..
I can be all.. talking dirty stuff like that.. you know.. like..
You Lil’ sexy thing.. with your Lil'.. boo..
What do kids watch these days?!
Some require freshmen to take off their clothes and go half-naked during some outdoor events.
Not that all camps are like that..
but you know.. there are some out there.
Just.. you get the idea!
But honestly, talking about orientation camps. What happened to the good old “First Dance?”
[Music] [Fist Dance]
[Music] [Party Rock Anthem]
And the fire-worshipping!
[Singing worship songs]
And the meat to scare-the-poop-out-of-you but doesn’t really scare-the-poop-out-of-you midnight trips.
[Insect sounds]
[BOO!]
[~!@#$%^&*]
Like man! Back in the days, we really kept it simple.
Orientation camps these days have really stepped up their games!
Sometimes a bit over the top.
So if you’ve been watching the news lately I bet that’s just the tip of an iceberg.
But as I said, you don’t have to do whatever your seniors ask you to do.
They’re like one year older than you
and you don’t even listen to your mom and dad.
So you’re not obliged to do anything that you’re told to.
Especially when it comes to the things that make you feel uncomfortable.
Especially like when people tell you to take off your pants.
Why am I laughing? It’s not supposed to be funny.
So to help you out, we came up with three ways
well, no, that’s two
Three ways on “How to keep your pants on during orientation camp?”
NUMBER ONE- MAMA SAID
Hey, freshman! Take off your pants if you wanna pass this stage!
My mama told me I should keep my pants on so that I don’t catch a cold.
Rookie.. grow up, man!
This is college! Mommy’s like ten thousand miles away..
Now..
My mama also told me not to take to strangers.
Yo! Freshman! I don’t think you get the picture here.
Mom~ there’s this stranger that keeps talking to me.
NUMBER TWO- ASK QUESTIONS
Hey yo, syue di! Come over here! Come over here!
I’m the keeper of this stage
and I say.. Take off your pants!
Why?
‘Cos I can give you bonus points, that’s why!
Why do I need bonus points for?
So you can pass..
Like pass my first midterm examination?
No!
So are they like credits for graduation?
No!
So it’s for your own pleasure..
............
That’s gross man..
Yah dude, it is kind of gross.
Gross.. Gross.. Gross!!!!!!
What? There’s a bug in my corn.
Okay, so you have fun and take off your pants right here. I’ll see you on the bus.
NUMBER THREE- BE PREPARED
Okay, syue di. To pass this stage, you need to take off your pants.
What? Why don’t you take off your pants?
Oh.. you chicken?
Well in fact I am.. “Chicken” (Rooster) is my zodiac sign.
Why? You don’t dare to take off your pants first? You chicken?
No, I’m not. I’m eagle!
That’s not even in the 12 zodiacs, man!
Oh, sorry!
You chicken?
Okay, you take off your pants if I take off mine! I dare you!
“Who pa who?”
That’s not English.
Whatever!
Okay, maybe we’re over-exaggerating a bit. But you get the point.
Like you wouldn’t show how much money you got in your personal wallet.
You got all these passwords for your smartphones and your laptops, so that only people you trust and that people you allow to can see.
So how much more valuable is this?
Not the T-shirt.
This.
Your body.
Arn’t you way more valuable than your wallets, your purses, your laptops, your smartphones?
Are you sure you’re gonna show off your body to people you barely know?
People respect other people who respect themselves.
Wow, that was kind of twisty.
But, it’s true!
So you don’t have to do whatever you’re told to.
Especially if it’s something that makes you feel uncomfortable.
And just know that “this,” your body, is very precious,
and you should treat it that way.
Son, take off your pants!
Mom, I was just talking about this! You can’t just tell people to take off their pants!
Do you want me to do your laundry or not?
[Music]