So someone asked me to make a video about the way I communicate with people
Persuasively, and I'm sitting here thinking like do I really want to do that
What if my friends watched this video what if my friends see that I'm just screwing with them all the time
And it's really not that bad
I've been studying persuasion in psychology for pretty much my entire life, and now the way I communicate tends to be persuasive
Without even thinking about it now. I'm not trying to Pat myself on the back here
I'm just trying to say that there are ways to ask for things to get what you want
And I want to share three tactics you can start practicing today
Hey, what's up? I'm Derek Halpern
You're watching planet Derek the place to go to learn how to get ahead in business and life and today
I've got three things to share with you about how to communicate
Persuasively the first thing. I love this way it by the way
It's called the good option the really bad option. That's the name of the technique you might have a different name
That's what I call it, but here's what happened me my video guy Mark walked into eataly
And he wanted to get a regular coffee the problem was
The regular coffee line had like 50 people on it well
Maybe not 50, but it felt like more than three people so 50 people on it now
I personally didn't want to wait on that line
So I told the video guy right then and there I was like look the espresso line has no one on it
Why don't we go there to get a good espresso?
Or would you want to wait 15 minutes on that coffee line and he said all right? Let's go get the espresso now
again, he's sitting here looking at me right now, and he's laughing because
Hey, don't give me the finger okay?
He was laughing when it all went down because I was like do you see what I just did there you go see listen man
I'm around you all the time
I know your tricks, but this whole idea of showing people the good option like do you want to get a good espresso?
or do you want to wait on line for 15 minutes helps you persuade people to what you want just by how you
frame the option
Now you can use this in all sorts of ways you can use it when you're communicating with people you can use it in sales
Presentations you can use it when you're trying to compare and contrast
Options with a potential prospect or customer this whole idea of good options versus really bad option helps you
Show how good something could be in your eyes versus how bad something is in their eyes
This next technique is something that I didn't invent, but it's called. I don't actually don't know what it's called
I think it's called like a negative affirmation, but here's here's deal. I have sleeping problems if I drink caffeine after 7 p.m.
At night, but I'm a coffee snob. I love coffee, and if I'm not to dinner in a nice restaurant
I want to try their coffee the problem is if I drink caffeine after 7 o'clock at night
I'm gonna have sleeping issues so I always ask for decaf
But then you have a predicament because how do you know if they're giving you decaf?
You could assume
They're doing the right thing and they're gonna give you decaf, but people make mistakes
and if you're a
bad
Sleeper when you get caffeine and you have something important the next day you should be careful about this so the question is how do?
You know if you're really getting decaf well
This is where the negative affirmation comes in when the waiter comes by and gives you the coffee you could say this is decaf
Right and at that moment
He may say yes
Because yes is easier, and he doesn't want to put himself in a position to disappoint his client or his customer now
I'm not saying all waiters
Do this great waiters will always correct themselves if they made a mistake of course?
But you don't know if this is a good person or not so if you give them the opportunity to give a positive
Affirmation like this is decaf right they're gonna say yes, however
You're better off putting them in a position to give a negative affirmation like this
This is caffeinated right at which point it's on them to not say yes
But to actively go against what you just said and say no
That's decaf this idea of getting people to correct
you is a way to ensure that you're getting what you want this idea of offering a negative affirmation verse a
positive affirmation
Now you might be wondering
How else you can use something like this well again the best time to do
it is when you're gonna ask someone if they did something and they have an
Opportunity to lie to you about it without you knowing the difference the third technique is known as the apples to oranges comparison
Now everyone knows when an apples to apples comparison
Is when you're comparing the same thing to the other thing to try and show people it's the same thing
But when you're trying to persuade someone and apples to apples comparison may not be the best solution
Which is where the apples to oranges comparison comes in for example?
Let's say you're trying to persuade someone to buy a new car and the car payment is
300 bucks a month you might say something like well, that's ten dollars a day, which is like all right
You're breaking down the payments for someone
But it's still money to money mind you you're breaking it down for a monthly the daily
But it's still money to money now an apple the oranges comparison might be simple as this
It's 300 dollars per month or ten dollars a day or really the cost of a cheap lunch every day
Wouldn't it feel great to just roll up to work in this remarkable looking car at the cost of a cheap lunch
Do you see how an apples to oranges comparison could help bring?
Context to an argument now again. You can't go overboard with these types of things however
It's important to put this in your web repertoire
You can't go overboard with these types of things, but it's important to put it into your persuasion repertoire
Let me give you another example
I was talking with a company who wanted to fly me out across the world
To do some consulting around some branding and marketing strategy online, and I was thinking about doing it
And they were trying to get a feel for my pricing now
here's the thing I
Never did this type of consulting arrangement before where I had to fly 18 hours to some other part of the world
Do a consulting gig for like two days and then leave
Now I usually don't do this stuff because I don't like to travel that much however. It was to a new country
I never been to before so I was considering it anyway
I never did it before they asked me my price
So all I said to them was this if a company wants to fly me out and have them give a one-hour keynote
Presentation my rates twenty thousand dollars a keynote now in this case. It's interesting because it's not an apples to apples comparison
This is a consulting arrangement
Haier to a keynote presentation obviously, it's different however
I wasn't sure how to
Make an offer to them so I offered this apples to oranges comparison as a way to anchor myself at a certain point
Now here's the thing a lot of people try to anchor themselves
with lies
Don't do that right. I actually get paid this so it's like you always want to anchor yourself with a true statement
But you can use that Apple to oranges comparison as a way to set the stage now
I hope you found this video valuable actually if you did like this video if you're new here subscribe to my channel
And if you're already subscribed and you didn't hit the notifications bell
Why not do me a favor leave a comment below this video and tell me which technique you're going to use
Today or tomorrow or next week, or you know what lie to me. What will you pretend to use just do leave a comment?
Show me you're listening. I'll see you in the next video
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