Often people think that social isolation and loneliness go hand in hand, and of course
sometimes they do.
But it’s important to know the difference between the two.
Isolation refers to the physical separation that a person has to social contact.
Loneliness is the emotional feeling of lacking these social contacts.
A good way to look at it is that a person can be surrounded by friends and family, but
can still feel lonely.
Similarly a person can have very little social contact with others but can feel perfectly
happy.
Anyone can feel lonely and it’s much more common than we think, although as we get older
our feelings of loneliness can increase.
This can be for a number of reasons- certain life events, such as loss of a loved one,
poor physical or mental health, loss of mobility, lack of confidence or environmental restrictions
such as lack of transport.
Loneliness can affect our health both physically and mentally.
It can cause us to become more anxious and stressed and reduce our self-esteem, which
can, in some cases, lead to depression.
It can also stop us from getting a good night’s sleep which can stop us from feeling motivated.
This can affect how we look after our bodies- it may make our diet worse or stop us from
wanting to exercise.
All of this can increase the risk of developing health conditions in the future.
A lot of the time people don’t like to admit when they’re feeling a bit lonely but it’s
important to remember that loneliness can affect anyone of any age.
Here’s a few simple things you can do to stay in touch with the people around you:
Keep in contact with your friends and family - even if it’s just a quick phone call or
email once a week- they’ll probably appreciate a chat as much as you will!
Try to get out and about as much as you can.
Make use of public transport, which is free or cheap for older people.
This will help you to keep active and improve your health both physically and mentally.
If you’re worried about your mobility then talk to your GP, they’ll be able to advise
you on things you can do to keep you on your feet!
Check for community groups or volunteering opportunities in your area.
Find something that genuinely interests you as this is great way of meeting like-minded
people and forming friendships with people local to you!
If community groups don’t appeal to you then you could always try the local befriending
scheme.
This is a supported friendship between two people and gives you comfort in knowing that
someone is there if you need them.
Let me introduce you to Janette and Bridget.
They were paired up through the local befriending scheme:
Janette: Hello I’m Janette!
Bridget: And I’m Bridget!
Janette: We were first introduced when I got in contact with the befriending service.
I live on my own and was looking for someone who I could build a friendship with.
Recently I’ve had problems with my mobility and I didn’t feel comfortable with the idea
of going out on my own, I think I was a bit nervous!
Then a few months ago I called the service to ask if I could be paired with somebody.
That’s when I met Bridget!
Bridget: I’ve been volunteering for the befriending service for a couple of years
now.
I do shift work and a lot of my friends are at work when I’m not.
I often think about my own mum and that if she needed somebody to support her that she
would be able to have that.
So it really spurred me on to become a befriender.
With Janette it just clicked straight away.
It feels as if I’ve known her for years!
Janette: It certainly does!
I was looking for someone just to come and talk to me or to go out for walks with, but
my friendship with Bridget has turned into so much more than that!
She comes and visits me a couple of times a week, even if it’s only for 5 minutes.
And if she can’t visit then she’ll call me to check I’m ok.
We also like to go to coffee mornings with other volunteers and people who use the service-
it’s a great way to get out and about and it’s lovely to be able to meet other people
and have a chat!
Bridget: That’s right, its company for us both- I’ll pop over in the evening and say
I’m only staying an hour and before I know it its 10 o’clock!
We’re definitely never stuck for something to talk about are we?!
Janette: Nope never.
We can talk to each other about things that we wouldn’t talk about with other people.
Bridget: We’re a shoulder to cry on for each other aren’t we?
I think in Janette’s case it was an issue with her confidence.
Although she has become less mobile she’s still very independent.
When you’re independent it can be difficult to ask for help, even if you’re lonely or
isolated.
Luckily for me though Janette contacted the service!
Janette: And for me!
Although I’ve had problems with my mobility I’m a firm believer in exercise- it keeps
you strong and balanced and can help to keep you independent.
I’ve been working on my mobility and since Bridget has been visiting me I’m becoming
more confident.
I’m looking forward to getting out and about more!
Bridget: It doesn’t just benefit Janette either.
Since becoming a befriender I’ve become more outgoing and it’s helped me to do more
activities during the week when I’m free.
It’s giving a little back and I really enjoy it!
Whether it’s a relative, someone you already know or a neighbour 3 doors down that you’ve
only said hello to in passing, if you know someone who might benefit from your company
then I encourage you to get in touch with them.
It can be really rewarding for you both!