Your spouse is a huge Mack truck coming through your life
not creating the problems but showing the problems that were there
When you get married you're coming into with all your flaws
In fact, marriage will bring out the worst in you
You knock the rough edges off of each other
You polish each other
There's a constructive clash
See, if that's the purpose of marriage
deep character change through deep friendship
then you're looking for somebody
who can be your most trusted counselor and your best friend
even if the person isn't yet
The secret marriage is to be able
to love your spouse during seasons in which your getting very little if any love back
your both self-centered that's the main thing that's going to kill you marriage
So look at your self-centeredness as your enemy
The Christian idea is
you fall in love with not just the person as he or she is
but with the person he or she is becoming
You know, love one another as Christ loved the church and gave himself
and he didn't love us because we were lovely he loved us to make us lovely
and that is the pattern and the paradigm for Christian idea of marriage