Hi, this is Ceema, welcome back, I’m so glad you could join in today. Well, today,
I'm gonna talk about a very interesting topic about responding to unusual situations. Well,
certain responses in English seem to be pretty natural. Like, say, for example, if someone
says, thank you, you're gonna say, you're welcome. Or maybe if someone says, I love
you, if you love the person, you're gonna say, I love you too. However, there are some
not so familiar situations wherein beginners in English and even people who speak English
every day are kind of tongue-tied when they have to say something. So today I'm going
to talk about a few situations wherein you've got to respond but you've got respond appropriately
because sometimes you just don't know what to say. You can't just say, an Oh or a thank
you or a welcome. You’ve got to say a little bit more than that. Okay, so what are those
situations? We’re going to have a look at the situations and look at the appropriate
responses.
The first situation is when someone tells you, you look beautiful or you look good looking.
Well, not everyone pays you a compliment, not every day right? so when someone tells
you that, I’m guessing is gonna be something that happens not so very often and therefore,
you're response should be, something like, that's very sweet of you, thank you. So if
someone says, you’re beautiful, you just say, that's very sweet of you, thank you or
you could say, oh that really made my day, thank you very much. Now if you wanna get
a little naughty or a little bit quirky with the person who has paid you the compliment,
you could also say, you sure have a good eye or you sure have a good eye for things. Okay
so when someone tells you, you are beautiful or good looking, just saying thank you may
not be enough every time. You wanna say a little bit more and that's when you can use
these sentences.
Alright and sometimes a friend or a work colleague would be sad or upset. Now because you're
their friend or their work colleague, you hate to see them that way, right? Now, what
do you do to make them feel better? Well, you could say something like; do you wanna
talk about it? I'm here if you need me. I'll tell you what, a lot of people who are upset
or sad; they may not wanna open up. So it is always good to ask their permission if
they really wanna talk about it. Okay, so you always start with, do you wanna talk about
it? I am here if you need me which means first you ask the permission and then you assure
them that you are there if they want to just have someone to listen to, okay. If the person
is ready to speak and has pretty much told you everything that he is sad or upset about,
you could say, I can't imagine what you are going through but it will get better. We say
I can't imagine because we're trying to tell the person that you're going through a whole
big deal. You know whatever you're going through is a big deal. So I can't imagine what you're
going through but you're telling them that, don't worry it's going to get better. It kind
of you know peps them up a little bit, right? So when someone is sad or upset, you now know
what to say, okay.
And well this is a tricky one, okay because and a very difficult situation really because
sometimes a friend or maybe a family member even has lost their job. This is a very painful
situation. This situation makes people very angry, very frustrated and probably very sad,
right? So, you've got to be very careful with your choice of words. There are very few things
you can say to someone like that but I think if you say, it's only a temporary setback.
Well, a job loss is a setback because maybe you've had bills to pay, maybe you've got
loans to take care of and now that you don't have a job, you're kind of short of money,
right? So that kind of puts you on a financial setback. So you should tell the person that
look I know you’ve lost your job but that's only a temporary setback. Okay, it's not permanent.
It’s only a temporary setback or you could say, with your talent and skills, finding
something better shouldn't be a problem. You know when people lose their job in very unfortunate
circumstances like say if they were fired or if they had to leave, they kind of start
to feel that they are not good enough, right? So you’ve got to make them feel that they
are good enough, they can get something better. So they probably have certain talents and
skills which are fit for the kind of job they're looking for. So you've got to tell them that
with your talent and skills, finding something better shouldn't be a problem and I'm sure
they'll feel a little bit better than they have already been feeling all along.
Okay, now we're going to deal with another very unusual situation. Okay but a really
nice one. What if you receive an unexpected gift? Well that's amazing, isn't it? I don't
get gifts very often so if I were to get an unexpected gift, I’d be really happy. Okay
now sometimes, you get a gift that you like, sometimes you get a gift that you don't like.
Okay, so respond appropriately depending on what situation you're in. so, say, for example,
you have a gift or you get a gift that you really like. Okay, you wanted a really cute
sweater, you got a really nice sweater for Christmas. So you can say something like,
I don't know what to say, it's lovely, thank you. You know, why do we say, I don't know
what to say? when I say, I don't know what to say, I'm saying that I'm speechless, I
mean the gift was so amazing, I'm dumbstruck, I don't what to say. So when you have a gift
or receive a gift that you love, you're gonna say, I don't know what to say, thank you.
I love it. Okay.
Now sometimes you get a gift that you don't like. Well, what do you do? Well you know
sometimes, you've got to appreciate the gesture, you know maybe the gift wasn’t good but
I think you should appreciate the fact that you were you know given a gift that the person
thought about you in the first place, right? So you can say something like that was very
kind of you. Don’t talk about the gift because you don't like it and you don't wanna sound
fake, right? So just talk about the gesture saying that that was very kind of you, thank
you, okay.
Alright, the next expression or the next situation, I'm sorry is again a very tricky situation
because we don't know what to do in this case. Supposed a family member of a friend or a
relative, one of the passes away. Well that's a really tragic incident, right? They are
going through something very intense. Something very, very sad and well what do you say? You
could begin by saying, I'm terribly sorry for your loss, right? I mean you can't feel
sorry enough for someone who is going through something like that but conveying the feeling
by saying, I'm terribly sorry for your loss is a good start. Sometimes when people are
going through a situation like that, where you know the family member is no more, their
life kind of stops for that period of time. Maybe like you know a week or maybe two weeks.
They probably don't cook food, they don't probably even tidy their house or maybe they
don't even take a bath, you know because they're just so engrossed in their grief. So you've
got to help them with things or chores around the house. So you can say something like,
if there is anything I can do, I'm right here because sometimes you may need to get them
food. You may need to kind of tidy up their house or just do some little bit, you know
little errands for them. So this is telling them that you know, I know you're going through
a difficult time, you can't do things for yourself right now but if there is anything
I can do, I'm right here. Okay, so you wanna show that your presence is there for them
in their difficult time.
Okay, now this one again is a very difficult situation. Some people go through a bad relationship
and fortunately that relationship has ended. Now, a lot of people are still sad because
of a relationship, well is a relationship and the end of a relationship can't be a very
good feeling, right? but you know maybe your friend, your girlfriend, she has had a really
abusive relationship but now she's very sad that it's over because there's no one around
so you can tell her, you're beautiful, you're smart and you're funny, you're gonna survive
this because believe me when you quit or when you come to the end of a relationship, you
feel like that’s the end of it. You know, you can't get anything better in life. I mean
that's just it but no, you tell them that you're gonna survive this. You are beautiful,
you're smart, you are funny. Okay, sometimes when people end their relationship, they feel
like they're never going to be happy again. They feel like that was the world to them
but you've got to tell them that there is so much more out there. So you could say something
like, you will be happy again, cheer up, okay. Well, these are the unusual situations that
I'm sure that sometimes you may come across. Okay, but with these appropriate responses,
I'm sure you'll be able to tackle it in the right way. Well, that's it from me on this
lesson, until then, this is me saying, bye.