You were here a year ago.
Yes.
You had goals, you had dreams, and things
you were going to do for 2018.
[LAUGHING]
Can I go through them and ask how you did?
Really?
Yeah.
OK.
Because I want to see, you know, are celebrities just like us?
[LAUGHING]
OK.
All right.
It said a number one, you're going
to meditate every morning, or daily.
Mm-hmm.
No?
[LAUGHING]
Did you start to meditate at all?
Did you even start?
I did start.
How long did it last?
I did an app.
[LAUGHING]
Yeah?
How long?
10 minutes.
Oh, once, once.
[LAUGHING]
No, no, no.
I did it intermittently for about three weeks.
Oh.
But not daily.
Yeah.
Exercise daily?
Ha, ha, ha.
[LAUGHING]
No.
No?
No.
How often?
No.
[LAUGHING]
Go out with girlfriends more often?
Yes.
Yes?
Yes.
That's great.
Right?
It's important.
It is.
Yeah.
Buy an expensive camera and learn photography
through a course?
I bought the camera.
You did?
[LAUGHING]
Yeah.
You have a camera?
I have the camera.
Have you used it?
Yes.
You have?
Yes.
In Africa.
Oh, wow.
Yeah.
Last March.
You went on safari?
Yeah.
Isn't that, like, a life changing experience?
My favorite thing in the whole world.
It's the best thing.
Everyone must do it.
It must be bucket list thing.
It's the most important thing to experience.
Be open to more dating?
[BLOWS RASPBERRY]
[LAUGHING]
Had you not been open to dating?
What does this mean to be open?
No, I have been open.
I have never--
[LAUGHING]
You filthy, filthy people.
[LAUGHING]
I have been open.
No one has asked me on a date.
[AUDIENCE AWS]
Not one.
Zero.
Where are you going?
Nowhere because no one's asking me anywhere.
[LAUGHING]
But you have to be somewhere to meet someone.
I mean, you can't--
if you're staying home, if you're out
with your girlfriends, are they all single
or are they in relationships?
They're all in relationships.
[LAUGHING]
Go out with some single friends.
Do you have single friends?
No.
Oh, no.
Wow.
Are you good at setting people up?
I'm so good at setting people up.
Think about it.
Let me know what are you looking for
and I have set so many people up.
Have they been successful?
Yeah.
They have.
Do I have testimonials?
Yes, I will get you testimonials.
OK.
So tell me what you're looking for.
Really smart, really funny, cares about the world.
Mm.
[LAUGHING]
That third one is really tricky.
Yeah, it is.
Really tricky.
It is.
Do you care if they're in the business or not?
I'd rather not, but I'm open.
OK.
All right.
Let me think about that.
OK.
What about age?
Do you want someone your age or younger or older?
I am open 10 years either way.
10 years either way?
Yeah.
That's great.
And now your son, how's he going to be if you meet somebody?
Is he going to be possessive and jealous?
He has been begging me to go on a date.
[LAUGHING]
Yeah.
It's like, I want to give him the gift of me
going on a date at this point.
Yeah.
He wants you to.
He was doing stand up last time.
Is he still doing stand up?
He still is.
And now there is nothing off limits.
Now he uses me in his material.
Oh, wow.
Yes.
Do you like it?
I mean, I kind of feel like I have to be supportive, right?
Right.
Yeah.
I mean, he's funny.
So if he's funny I'm like, OK, yeah.
I mean, if he's good at it, then you have to support it.
Yeah.
Hi, I'm Andy.
Ellen asked me to remind you to subscribe to her channel
so you can see more awesome videos, like videos
of me getting scared or saying embarrassing things,
like ball peen hammer.
And also some videos of Ellen and other celebrities,
if you're into that sort of thing.
[YELPS]