bottle bottle bottle bottle bottle ba ba
ba ba ba ba ba ba
Jimmy come on let's
hi it's Jimmy I hope you and your
friends and your family are as well as
can be expected in our new
post-apocalyptic world we are not on
live this week for obvious reasons but
since I have nothing to do and the fact
that you're watching this makes me
assume you have nothing to do I'm gonna
shoot a mini monologue everyday until we
get back from my house where I am
currently incarcerated
I mean camping out with my family you
know you learn a lot about yourself when
you're isolated at home for instance I
learned that I have two young children
which was really something to find out
thank God for television my blood type
right now is Disney positive or Disney
Plus whatever they call it we've watched
frozen two more times than the animators
who drew it have watched frozen - I'm
actually hiding in my office right now
from my children we've run out of snacks
we've run out of crafts to do we made
macaroni necklaces yesterday today I ate
them for lunch that's how bad it's
getting here's something I learned this
is a very good tip did you know that you
can make coffee at home for yourself
it's crazy I even spelled my name right
on the cup which was amazing
so anyway yesterday our president Donald
Trump gave himself a ten out of ten
for the way he's handled this situation
gave himself a 10 which incidentally is
the same amount of testing kits that are
currently available in the United States
right now and then Trump told people us
to stop hoarding unnecessary amount
of food that's right this man this
individual would like you to take it
easy with the food so please by order of
the president take it easy with the food
this is an especially tough day to stay
home obviously because it's st.
Patrick's Day and I do want to say a
happy st. Patrick's Day not just to our
Irish friends in the Irish Americans
watching but all alcoholics everywhere
and happy return of the potato famine -
so Tom Brady for whatever reason chose
today st. Patrick State to announce he's
leaving the Patriots and for people from
Boston this is like if Santa died on
Christmas this is terrible
Tom tweeted a message to his fans saying
he is forever
a patriot no matter what and he is
except for next season and for every
other season he plays after that so it
is a tough st. Patty's Day in New
England for sure but just because the
world is almost completely shut down
doesn't mean you can't have some fun
could always find ways to have fun so I
came up with a few ideas for how you
could celebrate st. Patty's from the
sanitized safety of your home
[Music]
all right now first you can do you put
on a festive Lea covered shirt like I
did today
my Guinness shirt I wear it once a year
next you can get get this in bread yet
get some food coloring and you can dye a
bottle of hand sanitizer green you'll
never get it off your hands but it's
festive nonetheless you could dress your
kids like leprechauns and try to catch
them and of course you could get drunk
listen there are no great ways to
celebrate st. Patrick's Day at home but
it is an opportunity for me anyway to
rewatch the greatest local news story of
all time and that is a leprechaun
sighting in of all places
Mobile Alabama curiosity leads to large
crowds in Mobile's crichton community
many of you brain binoculars camcorders
even camera phones to take pictures to
me look like a little card to me I do
look a bit of cheap
eyewitnesses say the leprechaun only
comes out at night if you shine a light
in its direction it suddenly disappears
this sammich ur sketch resembles what
many of you say the leprechaun looks
like others find it hard to believe and
have come up with their own theories and
explanations for the image well if that
doesn't cheer you up
forget it I mean now I'll be back to
check in tomorrow maybe we'll check in
with Guillermo tomorrow at his house to
see how his quarantine is going in the
meantime please stay home be safe wash
your hands wash your feet wash
everything and not just during this time
wash all the time and if you want to be
of service you can join me every day I'm
gonna make a donation to different
worthwhile cause today that cause is no
Kid Hungry that's where you can visit
them on the web they make sure kids
don't go hungry and with schools being
closed that is especially important
right now so please consider giving to
them really the only way we're gonna get
through this is by sticking together
while of course remaining at a CDC
approved distance of at least 6 feet
apart so hang in there happy st.
Patrick's Day and I will see you
tomorrow