Hello everybody! My name is Markiplier
and welcome to The Onioning
now it's been a while since I played a memey, stupid, horror game
and good to know that this is absolutely not that
In fact this might be
the scariest horror game..
of 2016.
In the little bit of time we have in 2016,
I think we may be facing the most dire threat we've... [scream in the distance]
[screaming continues]
...the most dire threat we've ever faced
in our entire life.
Good to know that mirror is functioning perfectly
as a window into the underworld
and I'm approaching this wall with utter care.
OK, here we go! Oooh boy (chuckle)
Oh! What a lovely bed I've got! *laughing*
Ooh! What a lovely pillow!
Aah! Just shaped like a dead g- ohh that doesn't work at all.
Hello!
Ok. Goodbye.
I thought I put... I thought I put the graphics on this to be "ogrewhelming!"
Oh boy...
Literally, that was a graphics option
It was: Low, Medium, High and then
(Deep voice) Ogrewhelming...
Hello! Ooh-oh-nohohoho
Every object in here, I can- I can tell was
custom made in Blender
just for this occasion. Even the-
Even the- even the illustrious mirrors here.
OK. Well... [light bulb explodes] *gasps at the jumpscare*
The fuck..?
*Deep Voice Singing*
Oh-oh-oh-n...
*Continued Singing*
Oh-oh-oh-no-ho-ho (nervous laughing)
Oh boy. Can I- Oh boy...
Where am I? Oh that's not good [Continued Singing]
He-he. Hi shrek!
How's it going?
You good? I'm good! If you're good I'm good. Ok...
[light bulb explodes] [Singing Stops] Hoookay...
*reads sign* I'm coming Ogre!
Oh good! I love company!
Oohhhh! I'll be so not alone anymore!
Oh what is that? ... wee-wee-weeeeb?
I can't even run so- ooooh... Hello
Alright. I can't get near this door.
[doorbell ring]
OH! COMPANY!
OH BOY!
I still can't get near the god damn door!
Do I even wanna answer that door?
Is- Is he coming ogre?
I can't go near the god damn doo-
OH! Here we go!
HI! OH GOD!! Blood!
OH GOD! Flashing hallway light!
OH GOD! Dark abyss!
OH GOD! I'm gonna die!
Alright here we go then...
I'm trusting this...
*HEADPHONE WARNING* I don't know WHY I'm trusting this. Oh boy...
[Shrek: HELLO THERE]
Fucking fuck!
[hurtful sharp squealing] OWW?!
OOOOH!!!!
[Strangely ominous music that is played in Hell in the background]
OH! Oh! I've been transferred!
Oh boy. Ah geez.
Oh no... Oh God. no...
Oh no-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho
I don't remember this in any of the Shrek movies...
Oh boy...
In fact I don't remember any of this in anything I've ever done in my li-
li-i-ife... H-hi Shrek... [Musics stops]
Oh! You're whispering such sweet nothings into my ear...
Oooohh. It's so-ho-ho-ho illuminating.
Oh no...What is that?!
Hello! Hi friend? Oh!
Oh.
Is there someone behind me?
Ok. I thought that was for s- OOH!!
HEY! Ohh my god! That's astonishingly creepy!
[Demonic grunting]
OKAY?!
ALRIGHTY THEN! GOOD TO MEET YOU, SHREK!
[Loud Deep Scream] OOH FUCKING, FUCK YOUUU!
Fuck you man!
Oh boy! Am-Am I back in my bed?
Oh I bet I'm not!
Oh god! What is this? *chuckle*
Oh! Is this supposed to be me tied to a table?
Oh no, no it's not!
Oh ok! Alright then.
Wow! That lens flare though!
Oh boy...
So-So what do- What am I supposed to interpret from this?!
So are these knife gashes in the table here and is that my blood?
What's with the TV?
Just something to watch while I'm bored, while I'm being eviscerated. You know.
Just something relaxing
Welp... I bet I can't open any of these.
Alright. Well! That one's got blood in it! Huh!
Ah! [Screams from the other side of the door]
I'm sorry. They're--
They're having a good time in here.
[Screaming continues]
[Weird Noises From Distance]
Ok! Alright! You know what, maybe I don't need to bother them!
Maybe they're just having a peaceful time by themselves and they don't wanna be bothered.
Okay...
Well I guess that's all there is so...
Lets uh, meander over here...
Hello?
*Weird accent* Shrekles?
Body dump?
How convenient! Body dump!
Oh boy...
[Shrek: HELLO THERE!]
UH, BODY DUMP?! [Loud Bang On Door]
BODY DUMP!?! [Shrek Trying To Break Door]
OKAY I GO DOWN THE BODY DUMP! [Shrek Continuing To Break Door]
WEEHOOO!
WEEEEEEEEEEEEHHHHHHH!!!!
I go. I- Have fun! I guess...
Oh boy... [Water Splash] more. Wow! This game is so evolved!
Game of the year! 10 out of 10!
11 out of 10!
22 out of 10!
Oh boy.
Oh boy...
What's with the red ominous glo-o-ow?
Well ok. I f- Oh f- I don't feel good about pressing random buttons.
Oh it's an elevator...
Oh. Ok.
Gwe...
Dre-Dreamworks Research?!?
Oh! You know research to find out what the kids like in the next Shrek movie.
Oh boy.
Ooh boy!
Inside everyth - I can't read that...
If someone wanted to zoom in and read that, then maybe they'd have a better time about that, but I have better-
Oohkaay...
I don't like this, not one bit. The Boss said everything is fine but Dave and I can see through his bullshit.
Whatever we're creating , it's not safe at all. *Mark giggles*
It's too dangerous to go through with it, considering we're in a fucking sewer to do this research with no security.
Just this whole thing is super shady.
Dave agrees with me.
Whatever DreamWorks wants us to create, I don't want anything to do with it.
I don't care if I lose my job, I just want out of this crazy shit.
Dave and I are gonna tell the boss we're quitting tomorrow.
Let's hope everything goes well.
Oh! I imagine that not everything goes well if there's blood dripping from your oozing vent.
Oh boy.
Oh boy!
Fell?
Fell?!
FELL?! What kind of keypad is that?
I didn't even need to put in anything!
Oh, ok!
Long hallway of blood!
ooohh...
Oh n-oh my god
Automated voice: Hold it right there!
Automated voice: Who are you and how did you get here?
Uh..
How did I get here?
Automated voice: Not gonna talk, eh?
Automated voice: Alright. I see how it is.
Automated voice: Maybe you'll talk after this.
[Spray sound] Oooh... After what?!
[Thud]
Oo-AAW MY BRAIN!
What the heck happened!?
I have no idea of what's going on... Oh! No!
Am I tie- Automated voice: Oh. You've finally awoken. (Markiplier laughs)
Automated voice: Good. Now. Let's try that again.
Automated voice: Why were you in that god forsaken sewer?
I don't know man... I don't know.
I'm just trying to sleep, you know!
Like most horror games.
I was just trying to live!
Automated voice: You still aren't going to answer me?
Uuh Automated voice: Why?
Automated voice: Is it because you're scared or do you just don't know how to?
I don- Automated voice: Either way, you've seen too much.
Ohh. Automated voice: You know about him.
Oh no.
Unknown: Don't you? Noo!
(gives info anyways) Automated voice: His name is Shrek. And he's something that can be never known to the public
Oh ok. Automated voice: We created him for DreamWorks.
Automated voice: Why?
Automated voice: Well, I don't even know that.
Automated voice: Even though I was, quote on quote "Boss".
Automated voice: I was still just a puppet. Taking orders from the higher ups.
Automated voice: And the orders were to make that damn ogre.
Automated voice: It was stupid I know. Then I wound up having to kill poor old Dave and Martin.
Automated voice: DreamWorks told me, if they ever told me they were going to quit.
Automated voice: I would have to kill them.
Automated voice: They told me they couldn't risk Dave and Martin, breaking their MDA.
Automated voice: Because if they did, DreamWorks would be one hundred percent fucked.
Automated voice: And if I were to quit, or not do as I was told, they would kill me.
Automated voice: Either way I was fucked.
Automated voice: I had no choice.
Automated voice: I remember the faithfull day, that damn ogre broke out.
Automated voice: I was with a bunch of the higher ups from DreamWorks.
Automated voice: Showing them the progress that the three of us had made, before I had to kill them.
Automated voice: Then, well, something happened.
Automated voice: He...
Automated voice: Awakened.
Automated voice: Started ripping the guys in half.
Automated voice: Blood everywhere. They tried the door.
Automated voice: Sealed shut, they tried to go through the air ducks.
Automated voice: Shrek just came after them and tore them to pieces.
Automated voice: I managed to escape. Through a secret passage, that was built into the walls.
Automated voice: I was the sole survivor.
Automated voice: And now I'm here. Watching, Observing the ogre.
Automated voice: Wait. What the.
Automated voice: Oh shit.
[Shrek screaming]
*click* Oh! Hey! Hi! Shrek! How are you doing? *click*
Oh, okay.
[Distorted All Star song playing] *Mark laughing* Oh no!
Oh oh oh oh. Oh my God...
Oh, okay! I guess that's the end!
Ooh, alright!
*giggling* "A short game that took way too long to make"
But it was lovely nonetheless!
Game of the year!
And just in at the last two! You know!
Oh man! That was-
I lov-*sniff* For some reason,
I don't know why, but these Shrek meme horror games-
are better then a lot of any indie horror games that I played.
It was just- oh man- that was so silly.
But either way, thank you everybody so much for watching! Hope you enjoyed that.
I got more horror games in my list, I just wanted to get through this one, because...
I don't, I have a special soft spot in my heart for these Shrek horror games.
And I haven't played a lot of them!
Just- I think the other one was, "Get out of my swamp"-
I'll put a link to that one in the description, but-
Thank you everybody so much for watching, and as always, I will see YOU in the next vi-
[Shrek; Oh ho yea!] (an interrupting loud noise)
Wha- fuck you buddy!
...in the next video
BUH-BYE!!