My name is Ashley Chea.
I have three daughters--
Amira, Azarah, and [INAUDIBLE].
- You look amazing. - Thank you.
My name is Shanicia Boswell.
And my daughter is such a huge part of me.
I'm Jennifer Borget.
I have a eight-year-old daughter, a six-year-old son,
and a baby girl.
You can have best mom ever.
I know, right?
It's so true.
What does motherhood look like for you?
For me, I think motherhood doesn't
look exactly like I expected.
I started my blog more than 10 years ago
before I became a mom.
And it was my way of what I thought being a mom
would be like.
Of course, that was all completely wrong
once I did finally have kids.
I'm always redefining what motherhood looks like for me.
You always hear "single mom."
And I'm like, well, I'm not a single mom.
I'm a single woman with a child, because my daughter's father
is very active in her life.
So I'm a single woman with a child.
Yeah.
It's some people that married that they're single parents.
So that is not--
that's a good point.
So the words that I live by are create, love, and power.
I feel like everything that you create needs
to come from a place of love.
When you do that, you're able to empower other people.
What are some misconceptions or myths
people have about parenting?
That we don't like to have fun anymore.
I was thinking the same thing.
Sometimes we can get away.
Or get a babysitter.
I still like to have fun.
I still like to do a lot of the things that I did before.
You know what's funny?
I was thinking the opposite-- of a misconception people have
about parenting is that, like, especially with Instagram,
that it's easy. - Oh My god.
Oh, that you just take cute pictures of your kids.
And that's it.
That's all parenting is, is like photos on Instagram.
It's frustrating, cause we do make it look easy.
I'm the founder of Black Moms Blog, where we talk
parenting, culture, and lifestyle from a black mom's
point of view.
And for me to be a mommy blogger is hard sometimes because we're
kind of going through the stage right
now where I'm experiencing a lot of mom guilt. Right?
Like, my child is like, mommy, can we
spend more time together?
And so it's a little tough right now.
OK.
How do you personally reclaim your space as a black mother?
Oh my.
OK.
I interpret that question as in me being free
and me being happy.
So I feel like just being my authentic self
as a woman is that's my way of reclaiming
my space as a black woman.
I like that.
All women of color are not the same.
We're not like a monolithic group of women.
And so I just feel like being your most authentic self
and owning that and being proud of it--
that is the best thing you could ever offer anyone.
I agree.
And I'm not just saying that. But it's true.
Like, reclaiming my time.
I'm happy here.
You know?
I'm literally going to make a choice
every single day to be happy.
Words I live by are "don't ever stop trying."
You would always have those questions in college,
like, where do you see yourself in five years?
And I was like, well, I just kind of want to be happy.
Whatever that looks like, I want to be there.
-
Let's see.
What do you think is the greatest stigma mothers
face today?
I think that the biggest stigma that a lot of black
women face is that we're all struggling moms,
that we are overworked, and all these
different things of-- you know, we're single and we're poor.
And I want to change how people view black mothers.
You know what I mean?
Like, we're amazing.
We are great.
And we can achieve so much more greatness.
I think the biggest stigma is that we don't
do things that other moms do.
And that doesn't reflect it, either.
It doesn't.
And so I wanted to start my blog,
because I was, like, I garden. I recycle.
I'm a vegan.
I'm a vegetarian.
I ride my bike to the city with my husband.
We do all of that stuff.
So we created Moms and Color because we
felt there was a need in our community to have events that
focused on issues that pertain to women of color,
specifically black women.
And it was just really important for us
to create a safe environment.
OK.
Here we go.
What do you hope to pass down to your children?
I would say self-awareness.
For me, I just want my children to be completely
aware of themselves and the impact
that they're having on their siblings on a smaller
scale and a global scale.
When you litter, that doesn't just affect your neighborhood.
That affects the entire environment.
You know what I mean?
So I want them to be super, super aware of themselves
and how they affect everyone else.
I really want my kids to know their limitless potential.
Children in general, I think are knocked down
a lot as they're growing up.
So I just really want them to believe in themselves
and to know that with hard work, they can
achieve whatever they want to.
I love that.
Words that I live by and I try to tell my kids every day
are "dream big" and "make it happen."
I like to remind myself overall, like, year
to year, but also day to day.
What's your little dream that you want to accomplish today?
And how are you going to make that come true?
I really enjoyed talking to you about this.
This was a really good conversation.
I learned a lot from both of you.
I love you both.
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