This video is about "Why You Feel Alone When Single!" I'll explain why you feel so alone and
abandoned by the entire world when you're newly single or you're desperate for a relationship and
have been single for a long time... To find out more please stay tuned to this video!
Welcome to The SCG Show! The SCG Show is officially sponsored by BetterHelp! The link to BetterHelp
is in the description below! Just recently I found myself in a new relationship again a year after
the previous one, so I've been officially single for a year and found it more
frustrating than anything. I'm 35 years old and most of my closest friends and family
around my age are either married, engaged, living with their partners or in long-term relationships.
When I broke up with my girlfriend a year ago for amicable and logical reasons
I never realized how lonely it would be... of course my life has changed, I work, I come home and rinse
and repeat and in between there might be the odd night out, the odd dinner, family get together,
I had fully become the last few years since I turned 30 a "relationship type of guy"
Where I'd go out and socialize with a partner rather than groups of friends. Look I'm not
saying I don't have hobbies interests and I've not leveled up in the past year, I really have
however when you reach a certain age in your life and you start to evaluate what's truly important...
You notice that maybe a relationship is what you want but not what you need
I remember scrambling to get plans in for the weekend with people, they'd often say they
were tired or busy with the kids or chilling with their partners....I felt abandoned until I
realized a week ago I did the same thing! Soon as I had an official girlfriend I prioritized her,
the relationship over a long overdue night out which I rescheduled a few weeks down the line.
People do abandon others when they have relationships especially when they get
married... they go all in and good luck to them... I could write a book about how many friends
have thrown me under the bus and neglected me about weekend plans especially when I was single
The single person has it harder the older they get and the more the others around them
are settling down and so on... it can be a very lonely and challenging thing to go through
but as is life. I hated being single but knew eventually I'd find a relationship again which I'm
now in and very grateful for. Let's dive into this subject deeper aka why you feel alone when single...
If you enjoyed this video please hit the like button for the YouTube algorithm and support
my channel by becoming an official member! The link for memberships is in the description below!
If you're currently single and watching this for whatever reason maybe you split
up with them, they dumped you, you divorced... understand that you must go through this.
In 2020 my Dad died of illness at 62 in a lockdown at the start of the pandemic
it was a difficult traumatizing time... I have no idea how I coped to be honest but at the same
time death is a part of life... I had to go through it just like the grieving process which never ends
his funeral and living the rest of my life without him in my life...A close friend of mine who lost his
dad a few years ago said "you're going through this, it's not easy but you will get through it..."
There are some people who could relate and resonate with the pain and suffering... there
are others who had no idea what to say or act or couldn't even fathom what was going on emotionally
inside me... I know this is a very harsh and brutal example but that is also how I felt being single.
I officially split with my girlfriend in summer 2021 and we agreed to not get back together and with
no contact it was completely over... no reconciling done for good...I had made peace with the breakup as
I did not wish for her or the relationship back and I was hell bent to move onwards without her,
and once again it means so much time alone. I was in relationship mode one second - boom I was single!
Weekends were relaxing but very much alone... most evenings alone... no more evening or morning texts
I'm not exaggerating when I say this, everyone in my personal life was settled down or in
a relationship... Looking back I realized that it was just a process to go through...
it does not have to or will not last for the rest of your life... it really sucks it's extremely lonely
and you feel like you can't catch a break even if you get dates and it just doesn't go anywhere.
But you must go through this... it's a part and hopefully just the phase of your life currently
If you are feeling very lonely because you're single and it's affecting your mental health, I'd
love to tell you about my official sponsor BetterHelp! I've personally used BetterHelp and found it
so effective for turning my life around for the better! It's an online portal that provides direct
to consumer access to behavioral health services. The online counseling and therapy services are
all provided through web-based interaction such as phone and even text communication... it's like
therapy on the go. You get four live sessions a month and unlimited messaging in between sessions
as well as access to group therapy webinars which are updated each and every single week. You can
sign up for the BetterHelp online counseling service in the description below. By using that
link you'll be supporting this YouTube channel as well as that I'll give you 10% off your first month
too. So turn your life around with BetterHelp! The link is in the description below! I'm not one to
play the victim but I've got to admit something quite controversial = that people have let you down
When I was officially single, I was promised the earth by all friends and family = "we must meet
up" they say but I never did. "We must go out" yet I was home on a Saturday night. "We must get together"
nothing was penciled in the diary. "We gotta go on vacation" you never book anything... "We must go
out and party, get drunk" but where, when, why is it not happened? "We gotta catch up with each other"
again where, when, why does it not happen? People are unreliable, especially if those people themselves
work hard, are in their 30s and above and are in a relationship or married. I caught up with
an old friend a few weeks ago.. it was crazy to think we hadn't seen each other in months
We hung out, spoke for hours, ate a lot of food and had a great night together. I asked him "what have
you been up to these past few months?" he apologized "I've just gone to work" he said "the gym, stayed home...
with my girlfriend who was out with friends that night... that's all. In all honesty I haven't done
anything" It hit me like a ton of bricks... as single people we assume when we feel down and lonely
that the world is having so much fun, partying etc when all they're doing is not much more
than you. The only difference is they're doing it with a partner or they're in a relationship
So they might let you down by being emotionally dishonest but at the same time they might just be
busy, they might be tired and exhausted from work, they might have problems going on, financial issues,
Being in a relationship, moving in together, having a mortgage, having kids is not easy... the only reason
we take it so personally when we're single is because we're focused on that gaping hole of a
loving partner or just someone in our life that is missing... We're so fixated on it that we look
elsewhere not in jealousy but in the sense of like everyone's got someone and I'm all on my own. But
also people are unreliable sometimes, intentionally and sometimes they just are gonna let you down...
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We all want what we cannot have don't we? In the first few months after my Dad died I'm not proud
to say this but I resented happy families and people who had fathers. I'd walk down the street
and see families and think to myself "I want my Dad back." I'd watch movies where the Dad is there
and present and think "I want my Dad back." I listen to people moaning about their parents and say
"I want my Dad back" I was fixated and ashamed to no longer have my Dad in my life. I didn't see
myself getting married or moving on without him because I was hurt, but over time and of course
even with the occasional triggers and reminders it was so painful... but I had to make peace with it
My father was gone but not forgotten and he would not want me wallowing or being miserable
about the blessing that is life... the same fixation and thought process can and was applied to being
single. As Christmas was approaching (a very tough time for single people) I remember walking down
the street and seeing happy couples and I'd think to myself "I want a relationship" I'd watch movies
where there was happy couples in love and think to myself "I want a relationship" I'd listen to people
moan about trivial things in their marriages and so on and think to myself "I want a relationship"
I was fixated. I could only think and notice that there was a void there and even spending Christmas
amongst couples as the only single man was tough but looking back it was a part of being single.
We all feel alone because we fixate and we are focused on the fact that there's not a person in our life
anymore and we want that void filled... however we have when they do bother to make the effort
friends and we have family, who do show their support and love for us at the festive times
and so on and so forth and we sometimes don't focus on what we have... we focus on what we want
we're too busy focused and fixated on the negative to appreciate the blessing
that THAT relationship didn't work out and actually being single is a process....
So you feel alone when you're single and you've had enough you cannot take another weekend or
evening on your own? You've recognized people are unreliable and you're fed up
You want to know what the honest solution is you want to fix this predicament don't you?
Dating. Yes I know but dating apps suck or there's no one out there or "I've been rejected so much or
I cannot take another possible time waster!" Exactly two months ago I was on the phone to
a mentor of mine who's a very close dear friend. I told him the following "I'm sick of dating...I've
dated plenty but not met anyone who ticks my boxes, I'm fed up with being single!" He said to me "well
just keep trying no matter what!" I did so, I never gave up and even though I got rejected a lot, met
a lot of crazy women and really took huge risks... and as I record this now I'm in a happy, healthy
fulfilling relationship. My point being is giving up is the ultimate failure...a season of singleness
is not one that lasts for eternity, it lasts for however long it takes for you
to meet the right person. Never settle and be aware of red flags and warning signs of toxic people too
I have no idea how long it will take for you to find someone... if that's your goal of
course... I don't know what the future holds for my current relationship, anything is possible but even
if I was to be single for whatever reason again tomorrow I've learned that I'm worthy and it's a
process and I will not fixate on people letting me down or the fact that I'm not with someone
and I will go out and date until I find somebody else again, as if Iwas to give up entirely then
that's a wasteful life isn't it? Because giving up is for the weak... this is the only logical solution