- We're not becoming heteronormative
because we're getting married.
We're like queering heteronormative
- (Jen) Institutions - (Leah) Institutions
- (Jen) which feels pretty fun.
- My name is Leah Foster. My pronouns are she/her/hers.
- And I'm Jen Sharp. And my pronouns are she/her/hers.
- We met at an It Gets Better event.
- October 16th, 2010, it was the first event in New Orleans,
and they were having people record videos
on a Saturday afternoon,
and I had volunteered to get some backup footage.
- (Leah) I was just kind of hanging out
and I said, "What are you doing?"
- Yeah. You said, "Are you filming this?
Or are you taking pictures?"
And then I completely abandoned my duties as camera person.
I just started talking to you and I had this
inner dialogue saying, "Be cool, just be cool!"
So I tried really hard to listen to that, to be cool,
and I guess it worked enough.
- And they came and took the camera away from you
- Yeah, they packed up and they asked for the camera,
and then we stayed for one more drink.
I had won a trip to Spain.
So we just decided to go around our nine year anniversary.
And we kind of started talking about,
well, that would be a good time to get engaged.
Or if someone was going to give someone a present,
- (Leah) What would it be?
- (Jen) that would be a nice time to do it.
- (Leah) You had rented a scooter, so you were driving
around Barcelona on the scooter, which was really cool,
but the GPS wasn't working,
and it was starting to get dark.
And we couldn't find where we were supposed to
have this sunset picnic.
And in my mind I was thinking, well, our proposal
just isn't going to be what I had hoped it would be.
And we did get there and it was lovely,
- And crowded!
- Very crowded with like teenagers who were, like,
listening to the radio and people were passing
around bottles of wine. It was fun, but it wasn't romantic.
And so we just kind of were like,
Hey let's exchange our gifts tomorrow.
And so the next day,
- (Jen) Yeah, after our morning yoga class,
we got on the scooter and just typed in a beach to the GPS
and drove to some beach and had coffee,
and then walked down to the beach and said,
"Hey do you wanna get married?"
- (Leah) Then, you know, because it's Europe
you don't have to wear a shirt if you're a woman.
So there are lots of topless ladies like walking
in the background of our selfies, which was funny,
but I thought it was perfect.
It was just a sweet moment in a beautiful setting.
- Yeah.
You know, I'd like to think that
if there wasn't the It Gets Better event,
our paths would have crossed some other way, but maybe not.
So I'm eternally grateful for the event.
- (Leah) I think, also in a more abstract sense,
just having an organization like It Gets Better,
kind of pushes the conversation
that we need to keep fighting for rights and visibility
and supporting young people.
It just creates a cultural shift
where, you know, people can feel
that they can be themselves.
The world is a big place.
If there are not people in your life right now
who support you or see you,
all of you, truly, for who you are,
there are people in the world who will.
It doesn't have to be years and years from now.
It might be just a few days or a few weeks.
You have to continue to, to try to, to be yourself
and find the people who will embrace you for that.
Cause they're out there.
- Dream big about what your life can be.
You know, it doesn't have to be the,
you're rich and famous and everyone knows you,
you're a household name, but it, it could just be
that you have a great apartment with great friends
and great stuff that you like, that reflects who you are.
- Weird stuff.
- Weird stuff!
I'm Jen.
- And I'm Leah. And we're here to tell you
(Both) It gets better.