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This plan can only work if we send in someone that looks exactly like Pablo Escobar
How you gonna find a guy that matches?
I already know one
So what do you want to eat?
Maybe barbecue or maybe burrito
Kinda seems like you should pick a salad?
I mean that's not really super important I think because like I don't train myself to starve
His name is Ryman Branson
Former child actor and self-described porpoise enthusiast
And luckily for us he's got the same face as the most wanted criminal in Colombia
Here's the situation
Pablo and his little army of henchmen live in a heavily guarded compound
And we're thinking that since you look just like Pablo you can get there and have a look around
yeah, you could find a lot of helpful stuff for us
Look, I'm an actor
So let's act
You know, your friend could get himself killed
Yeah, well we're not gonna send him in there empty-handed
That gun is real
Have you ever used one?
Well, I mean, how hard can a gun be to -
[GUNSHOT]
I'm not the best at wiping a gun
You think?
According to intel, Pablo's out of town for a few days
So now's the perfect time to make our move
You should be able to walk right into the compound with no problem,
but you gotta bring your A-game around Pablo's wife
Nobody knows Pablo better than Tata
It's good, right?
You like that?
Oh, hey, Mexican food!
Once you're safely inside, find out everything you can and report back
So what's going on?
Pepe saw me pooping
While I was eating S'mores and also crying
Hey you
Bring it in here
Who are you?
Your beautiful first-born son?
Agh, no, no, no I don't think so
Are you there?
Yeah I am
Turns out I am incredible
So what have you learned?
Well I've learned I'm a great surrealist photographer!
Guys, I need more rubber spiders!
Press the cork board so the entire manatee is behind the preacher
As a present, you get to put sunscreen on my legs
You're a pervert, it's not right
I'll need a balloon
Crazy as it sounds, they all believe he's really Escobar
Pablo, Pablo!
I think I just saw Brandon and Dylan down at the Peach Pit!
You know that's only a show
How can you be sure?
Soy Pablo
That's true
Hey listen
I want you to know that I know you're not really Pablo
Don't worry, this can be one of our little secrets
Okay
Boo-yah homie
Hey check it out, I got new stickers
Put the gun down!
They call me Suave 'cause I'm really suave
Hey, listen to Suave and put the gun down
Or else I'm gonna poke your nuts
Get ready
You feel that pinch?
You should just take that off!
But I want to wear the hat, though
I think it's gross
I don't really, like, care what you think
Hey does anyone have like a breath mint in here?
Wait, what's he doing?
Wow, it's kinda dead here
Just so happens I like to boogie
I like the hip hop all day
I need a goblet
Yeah, that's how you should always drink your favorite beer
A banana
Goes great in a salad I work at the bank all day
I'm lucky
Hello
Ohhhh, there's a walrus eating my leg and I mean you are supposed to be here
Yes, we'll be back soon
Okay
Who would put a walrus up to they leg like a fool?
Yeah!
We are not the walrus guards
Yeah!
Oh! That's so bad you guys
I only date women that have little tiny fingers
It's true, though
Wow, I think this cigarette is getting to me
God, I wanna pinch this baby
Like this
Wait no!
You know how deep I can talk?
Why don't you show us, Pablo?
Jelly
I like it
This is our bestest pineapple
That is a pineapple
I bet it's poky
It is
Cool stuff, that's great, it's cool
That's great
Call me El Guapo
Okay, sure
I mean, right now
El Guapo
That's so cool
Dang, I just looked at the camera
Ahhh
The man had no pickles
Well maybe you should have hit him like this
Yeah, you like that? You like it? Cuz I like it!
Yeah, first I will hit your little mustache, because it's really kind of sexy!
No!
I'm ready for it Pablo!
MAMA NEED TO HIT THAT
Florida has a lot of porpoises
My legs broke! AHHHH
I'm good at this
Hey, can I trust you with a secret?
Yeah
My name is Ryman Branson, from Pensacola
I think everyone knows this besides you
I'll kick your little butt
Well your head IS a butt
Your head's a raisin
You're cool
Wait, what'd you just say to me?
You're cool
Well, i think you're cool too
I really like this second Pablo
You've been good for this family, Ryman
What you got?
I wanna stay here
What?
I don't wanna go back to the guy I was
Dude, I think he's lost it
You see anything?
Yeah, I think he's got a puppet
Bunnyyyy
Hey Bunny, what's up?
He says "look where your flippin' fingers are"
"It's not cool to have a hand stuck in your anus"
[girl giggles]
What are you gonna do when Pablo comes back my friend?
I guess I just try not to think about it
It's time. It's time to go home Ryman...
No, you can't take me! Because they need me
I'm sorry
But they love me
Yeah, I know
Maybe sometimes in order to find ourselves,
we have to lose sight of who we really are
[music lyrics: "And the city is a long way"
"We can hide it in our pockets while we scratch it on the table"
"Maybe we can make it if we both hold our breath and we stay"
Never really thought love had much of a point
But i was wrong, it has a thousand points
I think your eyes look like porpoise spirits
That's really great