Why walking away is the ultimate gamble on yourself!
Walking away is an enormous gamble on yourself,
and as someone who's done it themselves, I believe it's totally worth it! Welcome to The SCG Show! This
video is officially sponsored by BetterHelp, get 10% off your first month in the description below.
A few years back I was in a toxic relationship with a narcissist
I was miserabl,e unhappy lost and confused... truthfully in the four years we dated I'd mentally
and emotionally checked out for a while back. I was just going through the motions, I was numb,
I had no idea where I was going in life at the time... the relationship scared me as did the future
Whilst there are no guarantees in life when I was in a relationship with the wrong person
I was pretty much going to get married and have a family with them... it was written that way, that
was the next step = Buy a home, get engaged and so on... but looking back it was like a death
sentence. I was going to sign my life away to the wrong person the longer I chose to stay. On
the surface and to those on the outside looking in, superficially my relationship looked good, we looked
good together, appeared to get along in public and seem to be moving in the right direction...
But internally as I already mentioned I wanted out... I hated it... I didn't want to sign my life
away and my future to a narcissist. I remember asking myself "if I walk away I'm going to throw
away not only a relationship but the prospect of a family and more only to be alone and be single."
I as 32 at the time I pondered that, and yes whilst I had no biological clock as a man as such, it was
a big question to ask. Nobody I personally knew had the guts to walk away like I was about to,
in fact I knew so many people who were getting divorced or in miserable relationships.
I knew I was only going to be met with toxic shame such as "Go back to her! Give her another
chance! Love conquers all!" from my friends and family, but was I willing to take such a risk to
throw everything away? If so it would go down in my personal history as the ultimate gamble on myself.
In late 2019 I finally did it... I walked away from that relationship
It was the best decision I've ever made in my life
Here is how it is the ultimate gamble on yourself if you are in a similar situation =
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As I always mentioned in most of my videos, you'll never be good enough for the wrong person
If you take away the superficial context of why you're staying with someone and look at the truth
you'll feel less guilty of walking away!
For example we may stay with the wrong person for these reasons = They might be very attractive
and look like arm candy for you, but remember beauty fades and rudeness lasts a lifetime
They may have a really good job and be financially comfortable... remember money can't buy you happiness
They might be the worst person in the world to date, but you'd rather stay and put up with them
than be single and alone. All your friends your age are getting married and have settled down,
you don't want to be the odd one out or the only person that's single at the next event.
When people end up with the wrong person it's typically far too late... they may have a mortgage
together, kids and be married... that's why the gamble on yourself is crucial and imperative.
I'd rather risk it all on myself than even think about gambling on the wrong person...
definitely a toxic person! Ignore the better the devil you know mentality, and all the fantasy they
can change or that love conquers all.... it's all lies... ultimately if you're even considering walking
away from them they're wrong for you. The gamble you're taking is in your favor... it's far riskier
betting it all on somebody who makes you actually miserable, abuses you, cheats on you and lies to you
You're in store for the wrong life if you settle for the wrong person, hence why you're walking away.
it's a much bigger risk and a much bigger gamble staying with that wrong person
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Perhaps calling walking away "an ultimate gamble" may be a tad overly dramatic
but I'm here to assure you that things will not be as bad as you feel or imagine. You're gonna
survive you're gonna be okay and you're gonna push through with better days on the horizon.
You could never have predicted what happened to me and my life the moment I walked away from the
wrong person... it was the test of ultimate nerve and inner strength. I walked away in late 2019 and only
a few months later in 2020 the pandemic started, I was locked down due to my health condition
with my family... and only a few weeks later tragically my father got ill and died at 62.
So I walked away and had to emotionally deal with fear, isolation, grief and tragedy. I was triggered,
lonely, scared and so upset... it was like a complete nightmare. I look back in horror at what happened,
I used to say to myself "Is this the price I have to pay for walking away, is this some
sort of sick revenge?" Once the dust settled life resumed as normal, and also whilst the pain of my
grief got more manageable... I eventually moved on and above all else I never reached out to
the toxic ex. I walked away from I never saw them again. I'd never had any desire to entertain them.
I survived basically, I made it and now I'm in the happiest healthiest relationship of my life.
So whilst it obviously might appear quite scary like it is a huge gamble, I'm here to assure you
that you will make it through to the other side and it will not be hopefully as bad as
you fear... it will be sometimes, our mind plays tricks on us and makes it to be more dramatic
than it actually is. Thanks to BetterHelp for sponsoring this video. I've personally used
BetterHelp and found it to be so effective for turning my life around for the better
BetterHelp is therapy online which offers weekly sessions via phone video and live chat... you can
match with a therapist according to where you are, what you're looking for and what you need
help with... if it's not a great fit you could switch therapists easily. Therapy is a great way to take
care of ourselves mentally, just like we try to do so physically through diet and exercise.
Online therapy can teach you valuable life coping skills and support you amazingly when tough times
occur. Click the link below or visit betterhelp.com/scgshow for 10% off your first month
of online therapy today. Go ahead and take that first step to turning your life around
with BetterHelp! As much as we hurt when we are deep in a toxic relationship with
the wrong person and we lose our way and become confused and drained... I'm here to
tell you that we can heal after walking away and recover and be happy again.
We can move on as well! My personal healing and recovery took longer than I anticipated... that's
because of the lockdowns pandemic and my father dying... but time is a healer, but only if you make
a conscious effort to move on, go no contact and do the work on yourself. What an amazing
gamble on yourself to recognize that healing is on the horizon if you're willing to do so. Here
are some steps to healing = First acknowledge that the relationship was toxic... this can be difficult
especially if you're in denial or didn't realize the extent of how toxic it was at the time. Next
seek support from friends, family or a therapist... Talking about your experiences and feelings can
help you process what happened and start properly healing, set boundaries when healing from a toxic
relationship. This can include not only just your ex but their family, friends and even your own
friends and family.... you might want to be away from it all as you process what just happened
Forgive yourself for the mistakes you made, yes you chose them, yes you persisted with them...
but that's life, we all make mistakes, stop being harsher on yourself. Lastly focus on personal
growth... healing from a toxic relationship can be a great opportunity for this, take time to reflect
on what you've learned from the relationship and how you can grow and improve as a person.
Healing from a toxic relationship is a process that requires time patience and support
In my opinion it's totally worth the gamble of you walking away
When I walked away from the wrong person in 2019, I was met with toxic shame from certain people in my
life at the time who had no right to say what they did. They insisted "You're making a big mistake, you
should take her back, you can't afford to be single, you're going to end up alone." Despite the doubt, the
lockdowns, my dad dying, the isolation... deep inside of me I had a desire and belief that I was going
to find someone better. By better I'm in a far more compatible, attractive, healthier partner
As I made a solemn vow to never have a toxic partner or toxic relationship again
Even in my darkest moments, my most scared, alone and isolated without a hope or prayer...
I held on to that belief that no matter what I'd never go back and I'd move on to someone different
Fast forward to present day I got that ultimate reward
The very partner I've always wanted and dreamed of... making that gamble of walking away pay off
Many others have experienced such rewards for taking a risk and they cannot believe how
much better their lives have become as a result. Walking away is the ultimate gamble on yourself
and if you wish to move on properly it will reward you with the greatest prize of all
the right person... making any gamble in these circumstances totally worth it!