Hey everyone!
Welcome back to Lavendaire.
It's Aileen.
Today we're doing another video in our Dream Life Series.
And by now we are well into our journey of creating our dream life.
Today we're talking about the journey and its obstacles,
because there's no doubt that you will face some challenges along the way.
There will be things that will come up.
It will get difficult at times, so today I'm just gonna share
five things to keep in mind to help you stay on course with your journey.
So the first thing to remember is #1) It's all about stamina.
It really is about how long can you last in this game.
I'm a firm believer that as long as you keep trying,
then you're going to succeed, you're gonna get somewhere because you're in motion.
The only way you fail is if you stop and if you give up.
So don't let yourself stop.
No matter what, keep going.
Remember that life is a marathon.
It's not a sprint.
You don't have to go very fast, but make sure you're being consistent,
making those little baby steps everyday but just pace yourself to last long.
#2) Flip the way you think about mistakes and failures.
I've already talked about this before
but it's worth mentioning again because it's so important.
Mistakes and failures are just a natural part of the journey.
If you're trying hard at anything, you're going to make mistakes.
You're going to fail sometimes, and that's supposed to be okay.
Don't be so hard on yourself after making a mistake or feeling like you failed at something.
What's important is that, when you do make a mistake,
take time to reflect on that mistake, what you learned from it,
how you can avoid that mistake or do it better in the future.
And it'd be helpful to keep this in a journal.
Maybe you could keep a mistakes and lessons learned journal,
so that you don't repeat the same mistakes over and over.
Experience is the best teacher, so you have to not be afraid to make mistakes
and just take action, make those mistakes, learn from them,
and that's how you're going to get better at what you're doing,
and that's how you're really just going to keep moving forward,
because if you're too scared to make mistakes and too scared to fail,
you're not going to get very far.
You're really just going to get stuck at some point in your journey,
so you have to get through those hard parts.
#3 is to practice something I call "conscious steering",
steering the direction of your life consciously and not doing it on autopilot.
A lot of people work hard and they do the same thing over and over again,
wondering why things are not moving forward for them,
wondering why they're still in the same place, even though they're working so hard.
It's not always about just working hard.
It's also about being smart - working hard and working smart,
because you want to constantly be evaluating yourself
and reflecting on your past experience.
You always want to aim at continuous improvement and continuous learning.
There's a quote that I really like that says,
"Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."
You really have to be honest with yourself and ask yourself:
"Am I just doing the same thing, expecting my life to be different?
Or expecting the outcome to be different?"
And if so, ask yourself:
"How can I do things differently?
What can I change?
How can I be more creative or innovative in my path?
How can I explore new ways to get to what I want, change things up?"
Because you really can't just work hard doing the same thing.
You have to use your brain, reflect, learn,
and improve in all the creative ways you can think of.
#4 is to learn to be amazing at self-forgiveness.
This is very important in your journey, because otherwise,
when you're going through challenges, you're going to beat yourself up
and it's going to be a struggle for you unless you are your own best friend.
Self love, self forgiveness, I see it as hand in hand.
It's so important.
What I mean by that is: If you fail, if you fall, if anything hurts you,
if you go through a painful or challenging time,
just learn to forgive yourself for anything you think you may have done wrong.
Forgive yourself, let it go, pick yourself back up, and move on.
The faster you can forgive yourself, the easier you will have it
because we're all going to make mistakes,
but the hard part about the mistake is not the mistake itself.
It's the aftermath.
It's the negativity we put on ourselves for making that mistake.
The best thing you can do is just try to release the emotional aspect of that
and just put on your problem-solving hat and just do your best,
do what you can to solve whatever problem you have in front of you.
I know it's easier said than done,
but you want to do your best to leave self criticism out the door.
No matter what, at the end of the day,
I just want to make sure that you know to forgive yourself and keep going.
#5) Remember that comparison is the thief of joy.
Focus on yourself.
Focus on your own path.
Know that your path is unique and different from everybody else out there.
I know we tend to just compare ourselves to our peers
or people we see on social media and it always makes us feel bad.
It always makes us feel smaller, insignificant, not good enough, and that is self sabotage.
So don’t let that get the most of you.
Make sure you nurture yourself, nurture your journey.
Do what you can do feel strong and feel confident in your journey.
And when you see others succeed, try to find it in your heart
to just support them and give them love
because everybody's going through their own battles and challenges,
and you don't see it from the outside.
Just know that everybody's path is so uniquely different, you can't compare any two.
If you do find yourself still envying others, then one thing you can do
to turn the negative into a positive is to study them and ask yourself,
"Why do I envy this person so much?
What is it that this person has that I want?
What part of their life do I want?"
And ask yourself: "What can I learn from them?"
Like I said, bring the focus back on yourself.
It becomes a self reflection exercise,
where you pick the pieces that you like from their life,
pick the good qualities that you like, even the qualities that you envy,
and start to cultivate that in yourself.
Really put all the power back into yourself because this is where you have all your control.
You really can't control other people's lives and what they do.
That's them.
Let them live their life.
They have nothing against you.
There shouldn't be any competition or negativity.
We should really be supporting each other,
and whatever we see from each other, we can always learn from each other.
I see everything as a learning experience.
So, in your journey you will encounter some obstacles,
but the most important thing that I want to emphasize again,
is to just keep going no matter what.
And remember what I said in #3, with the conscious steering.
Keep going but do it in a smart way.
Keep reflecting, reevaluating yourself, learning from your past,
learning from whatever you can, in order to be creative and try new things,
try new ways to make it work, basically.
If this way doesn't work, try another way.
And if this way doesn't work, try another way.
And that is the game of life.
I hope today's video made you better about your journey
even though there will be hard times and challenges,
you have everything you need within you to overcome those challenges and obstacles.
You can do it.
Just have the stamina and just keep going.
We're all here to support each other throughout it all.
Now if you're part of our email series,
you'll have a journal prompt in your email so you can start working on that.
I hope that it helps you.
Have a beautiful day, everyone.
Love you so much.
Now let's look at my favorite posts from the #DreamLifeSeries hashtag.