nobody expects the Spanish inquisition
in the early years of the sixteenth century
To combat the rising tide of religious and orthodoxy. We're actually going to hold off on that for a second today
We're talking about isabella of Castile and by we I mean me because Pluralist Modeski. I makes you feel more inclined to believe me
Oh, who am I kidding?
It's the majestic plural and we all know it
fourteen sixty something seals in a bit of a pickle king enrique
Cuatro his ax [bellas] half-brother is like 40 in stuck with one daughter and the nickname the impotent
This is not very good for stability and the Nobles want a little more power for themselves
They try to put his half-brother
Alfonso in charge and so alfonso marries Enrique's daughter Joanna ie his niece and he gets to be heir to Castile hooray
Now if only there was some way to ensure that enrique bites the dust sooner rather than later
[Fondos] Dead great, and the Nobles say bro. What did you poison him what no all right isabel you want to tag into the rebellion?
What are you kidding me Isabela being the model of a Modern major eleanor?
And that's really skilled in negotiations makes a deal with enrique
She gets to be the [heir] and they both have to agree on a husband when she gets married which to be honest is kind
Of a plus for her as well since Henry had been trying to marry her off since she was six first to this guy
But it didn't work because she was also offered to his brother who got arrested for conspiracy then to Henry's brother-in-law Portugal dented this guy
Who died on his way to meet her and he tried this guy and this guy so with this she'd finally be able to catch?
a break
Except that enrique tried to marry her to [his] brother-in-law again and this guy and finally she said look I'm [going] [to] marry this guy
And there's nothing you can do to stop me, and Henry was like are you kidding me that's literally the first guy
I told you to marry yeah when I was six of course they were second cousins
But it's okay because they got permission from the pope who had been dead for five years
Alphonso of Portugal
However was not very happy with this decision [a] lot of people thought that maybe Joanna should have been in charge since she was actually
Henry child, and there's going to be a woman [in] charge anyway
So he married her and invaded castile and by the way different [alfonso] still her uncle no half-sibling [me] this time
No, possibly another fathering plain
And simple totally her uncle but [castile] one sort of they one half of an important Battle told everyone
It was a huge success [and] support for Joanna died down Captain Portugal gave up on conquering inland iberia
But only because he had secured the entire ocean meaning unlimited pepper and the ability to turn world history into a collection of portuguese
Crossover episode put a pin in that for a second because it's going to become really important now isabella and Ferdinand
I guess did a lot of things right
There's a reason why Spain has one isabella that everyone's heard of and a whole bunch of enrique's that people haven't actually there's another isabella
I won't so you haven't heard [of] her because someone will correct me, but again not as famous [enrique] quattro was a big spender
But not particularly swell at spending in the right places crime was out the wazoo in castile
the only semblance of law and order coming from hooded vigilantes and local nobility and when people are more supportive of local nobility than the
Actual monarchy well that's how you end up with warring state to avoid this she created an actual Police Force a little brutal to be
sure
but arguably better than virtual anarchy playing for this was a bit of a trick seeing [issues] spending quite a bit buying back all the
Land [Enrique] it sold for dirt cheap back in the day
But eventually she sold that back and earned a little extra on the side by shutting down Spain's
Overabundance of mints and stopping inflation an important lesson that nobody would ever forget about Charles on the flip side there were a lot of
Ways they earned money by [doing] things
Less right Ferdinand and Isabella finally finished the reconquista spending 10 [years] we conquering the moors lands of Granada no harm
No, foul
[but] now they had all these muslims and jews in their kingdoms and that that just wouldn't do they decided to be a little more
Lenient than the Almohads with their convert or be killed laws and implemented a convert or get the hell out of our country
But don't take any of your valuables with you, and yes that means going back
but leave your horses behind law now you might expect that a lot of people would cross their hearts and hope to die if they
Were really really truly catholic and go through the baptisms and the masses and the communion, but not really believe any of it
But isabella and Ferdinand realized this and created a league of Catholics dedicated to sniffing out the truth using whatever
diabolical means necessary
not
Realizing of course that people tend to tell you whatever you want to hear when you put them on the rack they also went after
Protestants
Which is sodomy so there were only about 500 cases in total and most had to do with coerced Pedophilia rather than homosexuality and eventually
Freemasonry however, they did manage to get a lot of money out of the whole ordeal and get on the church's good side
So they were ready to spend on things like oh
I don't know a certain ill
Calculated voice to the east indies take that pan out [of] the portugal deal because it's time to talk about the mariner everybody loves to
Hate if San Bolas Istanbul not constantinople, so the silk Road was nobody's business
But the turks and now the portuguese had control over the ocean surrounding the coastlines of Africa and Asia meaning the only way east was
[wiest] so they threw some of their extra cash at Columbus
And he brought back slaves
Tobacco and the door to [a] literal
mountain of silver [that] has yet to be exhausted to this day and spain went from being a couple dinky little kingdoms and I be
Get to the biggest baddest superpower in the world for about a hundred years
Unfortunately they decimated the population of the new world and crashed the global economy, but nobody's perfect
Fun fact about the inquisition. It didn't die with isabella. [it] kept going until
1834 Yeah, Andrew Jackson was in his second [term] when people stop getting inquisitive crazy talk anyway
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